My husband and I are both 33 and have a 6 year old daughter. We lived with my in laws and regrettably had my daughter early on in the relationship. I didn’t know how controlling they are. They pushed us out about 3 years ago when we weren’t financially ready. They were supposed to increase the days we had with her. Instead they didn’t. My husband didn’t care. We had money problems but I didn’t know where to go to for help. My parents were supposed to have meetings with my in laws- to prevent this becoming a mess. But all they cared about was themselves. We couldn’t afford the place. My in laws lied and filed for custody. I desperately want my daughter back. It has been 3 years of empty promises of getting my daughter back. Everyday is a screaming match. Please help
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No its not. We want to hear that she understands what's going on and what action she needs to take to steer any of this in a better direction, and is taking it.
And what has it actually got to do with you?! Go away and leave her alone. You're probably the one that has been smashing her the whole time. Bugger off!
OP would you like to work through it from the beginning with me so I can try and help you?
You don't need to respond to anyone else if they are making you feel bad.
Hardly.
I want to hear she'd spoken to her GP about her mental health.
Nothing.
I want to hear that either she, or they, live in a stable home and have worked to be financially independent.
Nothing. There has been no response on living conditions or a change in financial ability.
I want to hear she's spoken to legal aide for a to do list, a check list of step by step instructions to reach her goal.
Nothing, more excuses. Or more of the same excuses.
This time around, I want to hear her say the word "I ". Not "my husband", not "my in laws", not "my parents". I as in being perfectly capable of functioning as an adult independently of anyone else. Nothing there either.
My questions and statements have been directed towards one of these but there's nothing.
Since I'm one of the people commenting I guess I must be one of those judgemental cows, while we're at it take a look in the mirror. By your own comments you're no better.
Good luck getting answers.
My husband was diagnosed with Autism during the court process. I guess that explains a lot of his behaviour.
And it could explain his parents, his relationship with his parents in them knowing him and him palming off to them happily. But at the end of the day any explanation for it doesn't matter, it's clearly not something a child should be around.
And it does not explain why you've chosen your path. Why you're here trying to understand him when you really need to understand yourself. What are you doing still there understanding him instead of being the one that steps up and takes that child? That's what a psychologist will help you with. Unraveling all of it. Understanding YOU in it, not them.
The psychologist just tells me to stay in the relationship and have another kid, so I can prove it in court, that they’re lying. Despite me telling him for the past 12 months that I just want out of this bad marriage.