Lonely lost and scared
Recently I found out I was pregnant. Upon telling my partner of 6 Years I was shocked when he pretty much said he no longer wanted to be in a relationship and. It was over. We have a 4 year old boy whom he has barely made any contact with despite my efforts to encourage their bond and letting him no his welcome to arrange times to pick him etc. However he has decided he is leaving our small country town to go to QlD. I have no family where I live no friends and family is 6 hrs from me. Financially I'm not well off since the separation and have seen no child support. I have had the worst track record with pregnancy with losing babies and I'm terrified I'm know I'm blessed but I'm scared I have no one to turn to or talk to my family was all I had. I'm so angry for him leaving pregnancy is a time when you need your partner most I'm exhausted with running after my 4 year old working studying and trying to keep this house in order whilst dealing with both mine and my son's hurt. I'm struggling to move on for the next 9 months I will have a beautiful baby growing side me that reminds me what he has done and how he has let us down I'm scared my baby won't have a dad, that I'll have to stop working to look after baby and will we survive financially. I suspect there is someone else he has made it clear there will be no reconciliation.
3 Replies
Big hugs. You have such a lot going on at the moment. Of course it's a really scary time for you. A few suggestions. Firstly it sucks the father doesn't want to be involved but better that he is out totally than one of those guys who continually says he is going to do something and doesn't. There are plenty of ways to have a male role model for your son, programs like big brother etc and a rocking strong mother can be better than a crap father! Secondly you will survive financially. The parenting payment can be lived off if that's the way you need to go. You won't be rich and some adjustments in priorities will need to be made but it's totally doable. Thirdly you may want to consider moving closer to family. Why stay somewhere where you don't have the support you need? Would family put you up while you get your feet on the ground? Could a family member come and visit for awhile to help you? Talk to a financial counsellor about your financial situation to see what they can suggest too.
Hi ladies Thankyou for you kind words and suggestions. I don't have a family I can go to for help or to put me up due to growing up in abusive home and leaving young for a better life. I talk to mum now but do not trust enough to out myself in a position where I could be at more risk. I do not know my dad and grew up with one. I have very limit friends here as I have been quite isolated. I'm not sure what I will do cherie thankyou for your photo I have wrote this and stuck it on my fridge. I think I'm more scared and feel very alone and isolate although he has turned to be quite an ass hole for a long time he was my best friend. Feeling like I need a best friend.
Hi, first of all am sorry for what you are going through. But you are already a mummy therefore a little persons world and lucky you you are about to be again. Where you live do you have any friends or did you move there for him? Perhaps a change is what you need? New town? Also he needs to pay child support so apply for that or at least talk to centrelink. Goodluck!