Bit of an intro first. I'm 21 with two daughters, 2.5 and 1. I did a pregnancy test yesterday cos I'd been having symptoms and it was positive. I haven't had THE BEST relationship with my kids dad/my partner but we've been working on it and I'm not questioning this pregnancy I think I can do it with or without him and I'm happy to keep it (so is partner) and I know I'm young but I don't want to base my decision on age, possibility of finding someone else or what my friends think. I have one close friend who is really disapproving of me having another baby and actually went to the effort of writing me a lengthy message telling me to think about it but everyone else is happy for me, is she wrong to not want me to keep it or am I doing the wrong thing in keeping it? I pay all my bills and rent on time and my kids have everything they need, they're never without.
8 Replies
She is probably just worried about you and may not have gone about telling you the right way. You know what's best for you and it's your decision. Maybe have a face to face with her and ask her why she is so against it. Unfortunately texts tend to be easy to misread and it's easy to take their tone wrong. Don't lose a good friend over a misunderstanding
I saw her face to face yesterday and she sent this today
Honestly if you were my sister I would of course think the situation wasn't ideal, and wish that it hadn't happened. I would of course once I got over the initial surprise support you in what ever decision you made and be happy for you. I'm sure you'd admit this wasn't the best timing.
I think she was out of line writing the letter though but I think you know that it came from love and concern.
Does that mean you shouldn't go through with the pregnancy, that is 100% your decision, there is no right or wrong decision, it is your decision. Your decision was to have the baby and that's what you should do.
It's not ideal! And definitely wasn't the best timing.. But it happened and i think I can handle it.
I know she is just concerned but I feel like she's basically trying to tell me I shouldn't keep the baby and i don't know how to feel or react.
Tell her it's your decision, decision is made and you hope she can be happy for you. That's all you need to do, and don't think anymore of it, unless she is being unsupportive on an ongoing basis.
That must have been really upsetting for you. I would send her a brief message saying thanks for your concern, this is myself and partner's decision and you hope that she will be supportive of your decision. Do you think she could be jealous for some reason?
I'm not sure, but she went as far as to say she doesn't think I'm emotionally stable enough to have another one when I told her to not base her persuasion case on my partner or money (I'm not broke she just thinks I am)
You are young. Let's just hope your partner and yourself stay together. Does he support you financially or are you on benefits. Do you work or study?