This might be a strange question but im the younest mum is my sons prep class I made friends with a mum three years older them me she seemed grest till I had my last baby a month ago she stop talking to me unless I spoke to her I had her on Facebook and she put a status up I felt judged by it as she was pretty much saying mikd ocd is a load of crap and u only have ocd if u have to clean and disinfect everything daily I put a little status ony face book vent then she jumped down my throat over it call me insecure and childish 5 mins later say had a status on her facebook about me I told her how I felt and was honest but she keep acusing me of think all her facebook comments and post were about me witch isnt true at all she put abuse status about her family all the time so how could I her friend also called me childish and insucure as well I no I made a mistake put it on facebook im will to say sorry um extremely stressed at the present my car broke down and I have three weeks to find a house with out a care and im up with a baby most of the night I feel im acting older then them but I dont no how I can face them with out saying something I will say sorry as I no I did wrong but at the same time im so angry for being told im childish insucrer and I should take there comments gracefully and not stick up for myself I have been diegnosed with mild ocd it not as bad as other I no I no her post wasnt directed at me it was about my feels about what she said but also her attacking me for have feeling calling me childish and insecure thats what has upset me I no I shouldnt have put it on face book I no I took stress out on her I no what I did wrong I never dined it even to her friend but how am I the childish one and insecure when she went to the school that afternoon and baged me out to everyone I dont get to have my say or a chance to say sorry or anything I just get to be a horrible person because I wanted to wait tilll my car was fix so I could say sorry face to face I can reacted when I feel attacked or have feeling I want to brake her face im so hurt and upset how can I face her or anyone there now im sick of being the bad person all the time I never get a chance I wouldnt hit her its just how I feel
Sorry for the long story and spelling mistakes
school mums
school mums
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Parenthood Guilt, Education, Behaviour
11 Replies
I know the 'status' you are referring too about OCD. The intent of that post is to change people making light of OCD. Yeah my son has OCD and it annoys me to no end when people claim to have it when clearly they are not diagnosed with it (I don't know your diagnosis) and just have some quirks but they are not debilitated by it, not on medication etc. it like me saying I'm a little bit schizophrenic, it's insulting to people with schizophrenia.
So if it's the same post I think you jumped the gun and it was highly unlikely that post had anything to do with you.
I have been diegnosed with mild ocd it not as bad as other I no I no her post wasnt directed at me it was about my feels about what she said but also her attacking me for have feeling calling me childish and insecure thats what has upset me I no I shouldnt have put it on face book I no I took stress out on her I no what I did wrong I never dined it even to her friend but how am I the childish one and insecure when she went to the school that afternoon and baged me out to everyone I dont get to have my say or a chance to say sorry or anything I just get to be a horrible person because I wanted to wait tilll my car was fix so I could say sorry face to face I can reacted when I feel attacked or have feeling I want to brake her face im so hurt and upset how can I face her or anyone there now im sick of being the bad person all the time I never get a chance I should add she has it but doesnt do anything about it at all
I know your feeling stressed but seriously you want to be forgiven for reacting when you shouldn't have done, yet by the sounds of things your blaming her for reacting when she shouldn't have done?
I think your both pretty even!
I believe we r both in the wrong she went alot father then I did when she went to the school and baged me out to everyone I wasnt even there my son has been home from school since tuesday sick I no what I did wrong I have owned it since it happen but really im not aloud to have feeling that ridicules I should be able to feeling she went above and beyond so did her friend im 23 im not prefect and only ever had one really friend and even then I made mistakes and we always talked it though worked it out I hoped this friendshio would have been the same I bearly new her and I help her when she need to talk and vent
I think youre being very mature in taking ownership of what you did wrong & acknowledging you have a lot on, are overtired, overstretched & sensitive. I think if you offer that apology & let the rest go (for your own sanity if anything) then if she cant accept & move on then shes just not a friend & leave it at that.
As much as I want to see the good in her I dont think I could be her friend again it will take alot of time if I was to be her friend im will to say sorry but to her face not over facebook or txt or on the phone im very hurt by what she did I just expressed my feeling and was honest she call me names and had her friend do the same and baged me out to people at my sons school I belive im aloud to express myself I Just did it the wrong way in so and I belive if I wasnt feeling the way I was I dont think I would have reacted to it at all and see as she was in a simlar situation not long ago I thought she would have been more understanding to it same as her friend but I guess not
This friend doesn't sound like a very nice friend.. It's quite childish of her to be gossiping among the other prep mums about you, by the sounds, she hasn't quite grown up since she herself was in school.
What you need to do though is take the higher road, you don't need to be friends with school mums, my daughter was in prep when I was 21-22 and I didn't even try to befriend the other mums, I knew when I met them that we just wouldn't gel so I didn't try to impress or buddy them, we're all different walks of life and we aren't going to get along with everyone. My daughter is now in yr 4 and I can still say I'm the youngest mother in her class, she visits her friends, goes to birthday parties, has sleepovers, I'm polite, I have a coffee with her friends mums if I'm asked, but that's as far as it goes.
You need to let the argument and the friendship go, one big thing is to not use Facebook as a place to argue, if you confided in this friend that you have mild OCD and that was followed by a post on Facebook, i would say 100% its directed at you, but the beauty of facebook is that unless your name is tagged in the post, it could just be a general post directed toward no one, just ignore it though, hide the post, it's out of sight, out of mind
Just be a bigger person and choose not to have a friend like that in your life, let this other woman say what she likes to the other mothers, soon enough, once you're old news, the gossip will be directed at another mother with a better story ;) don't bother explaining yourself to her, she sounds unreasonable anyway, just smile when you're around her and the school, don't let them think their immaturity effects you, move on and surround yourself with people that genuinely want to be your friend
And stay away from Facebook when you're upset with someone, 99% of the time, it only makes things worse :)
Unfortently I have had to make a hard choice today to take my son out of the school due to her I recived a txt from her abusing me apprently im a stalker yet I blocked her on facebook as I dont wish to be her friend in any senese and have no contacted with her and im Just starting mire stuff yet I havent had any contact with anyone since Wednesday so that what its come down to as I believe she will Just keep going to matter what I do I didnt want that to happen I didnt want it to come to having to take my son out of the scho he so good friends but if I go back to tge school she will keep talking smack and I even believe i will get another txt maybe even a call anyways i just cant believe a 26 year old can act so poorly
Taking your son out of the school, away from his friends and where he is settled so close to the end of the year, over this, is over reacting. Have a chat to the principal about the other mother. In all walks of life you will run into people who you may have issues with. You have to learn to be the strong one and just ignore it and not let it effect you to this extent. how could something so ridiculous be blown into this big issue. Let her talk. Who cares. Block her number, block her on facebook. And dont react irrationally. Keep your son in school, its not his battle.
We r removing him due to multiple thing this is the icing on the cake he hardly goes due to other reason he has bern bullied all year he was to young to start so he is behind school are zoned we r moving so no its not just one thing not just her and me and his father agree it not worth it
I think you are both making a bit of a big deal out of nothin and I read you understand that. So now you need to think, Is she really someone you want to be friends with if you can't even have an ADULT conversation with her about some silly Facebook status and a misunderstanding?
And you know what, if I was one of the parents who she was talking about you to, I would of rolled my eyes and stopped listening to the childish nonsense.
I'm 23 also and heres some advise from one young mum to another, don't allow negative influences into your life. I have cut ties with a couple of other mothers along the way because they brought me down and were not good friends. And parenthood is hard enough without having to worry about the things you just described.
Also don't post anything directed at another person on facebook. If its something that you need to discuss with them, do it privately otherwise your inviting a lot of people to have their say and judge you. And it just blows little things out of proportion. The key to any good relationship is communication, whether its a lover or a friend.
And lastly, don't worry about this anymore lovely. Just delete her off Facebook and forget about her. She will find something else to be ranty about and in a few weeks it'll all be forgotten. You can apologies if you want but she doesnt exactly sound mature enough to accept an apology so you may be wasting your breath.
Stay positive! keep your head high! :)