After some advice/reassurance please!
My daughter is 18 months old and our only child. Her father and I both work and I am also studying at university, so she goes to day care 5 days a week. My daughter has ALWAYS been a stubborn, strong willed child. She has a huge personality for someone so little! She has fantastic teachers at day care who absolutely adore her because of her personality and as such she can be a bit spoilt. Feedback we have received is that is quite bossy with other kids (wanting them to play what she wants, trying to check their nappies, packing up their lunches for them, giving them water bottles/dummies etc.). She is also very independent and very willing to help (often the teachers will get her to help put things away, carry bowls for lunch etc). This feedback has been given to us in the context of “oh shes so funny, cheeky” etc.
She is being moved out of the nursery at day care in a fortnight and up to the toddler group. She is being moved nearly 3 months ahead of when she was scheduled too (leaving older children behind in the nursery). The initial feedback that we received for this has been that she is developmentally ready to move up and that she has outgrown the nursery, which I agree with (as much as it breaks mummas heart to not have a ‘baby’ any more!). I know she will be fine with the move, the groups are mixed majority of the day anyway and she the teachers in the next group are just as fantastic.
My concern is that I have noticed over the past few weeks that she is hitting us when things don’t go her way, shaking her finger at us, telling us to “Get” and just generally being a little madam! I have also noticed that when she is playing with the dogs she is doing this too. When this happens we tell her not to hit, it’s not nice, make her say sorry etc. I wasn't sure if this was just an at home thing and was concerned that she might be doing this at day care with the younger kids. I had a chance to catch up with one of her part time teachers this morning and was shocked that she can be in, the teachers words “quite mean and nasty” to some of the other kids with hitting, not sharing etc. During this conversation her group leader arrived and I redirected the conversation to her. She confirmed that she had been hitting etc. that this was also part of the reason she was being moved. She said that my daughter is definitely the “Queen Bee” and that by putting her up to the next group with older children, they believed would put her back on even ground. I am ok with this (I think!) I am just concerned about my daughter’s behaviour. She is the youngest child out of the cousins/friends etc so she has always socialised with children older than her outside of day care.
I guess I am after some reassurance/advice that this is normal behaviour for her age and maybe some reassurance that what we are currently doing and the move up to the older group may stop this behaviour??
1 Replies
Ok, it's not something you need to be racing off to a dr for in my opinion :) but it's time she learnt she isn't the boss and that she is a child and shouldn't be parenting other children or her parents. Make sure your clear who rules the roost!