I have posted twice before and have got some wonderful answers and ideas, which I have tried but to no help now unfortunately. My husband asked to split up 2 months ago now, and whilst I just thought it was just him trying to get some attention, and I will win him back like I have in the past, it seems it is for real this time. During these 2 months, I have fought and got to a point of pure and utter desperation for him to take me back. I love this man, married for 12 years (15yrs together), 2 kids. He had been staying at his parents house (whilst they were away) but I have just come home tonight from a shift (midnight) to find he is sound asleep in my bed. And, he has got the spare mattress out... I am so angry and really annoyed! I don't even have any spare blankets!
He has told me, that he went to the bank last week to see if he can get pre approval to buy me out of the house. I don't want to leave my house, why should I have to? For the past 4 years, my fortnightly wage has been the only payment on the home loan, while he gets time to pay off the other utilities and school fees. He has not helped me much financially for 4 years and earns 3x as much as me! I have openly struggled and I was just told to stop buying stupid shit.I am not trying to get his money, he can have it, I just don't know what I should do with the house. I refuse to leave. I will refuse any amount he offers me. I want to keep my house. I would just like info on what the bloody heck happens with a separation? I've been told to not leave, not accept any of his offers, to wait for HIM to put divorce through, start all the legal proceedings and once divorce is final, wait the 12 months before doing anything with the house. I just need to know what my options are, as I am really scared of losing so much, especially my house.
Thanks so much.
Really need help
Really need help
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Money
5 Replies
See a family law lawyer asap!!
Defiantly see a lawyer! Even if you end up with the house you will still have to pay him out. Get all the advice you need from a legal perspective and then go from there.
Don't stress mumma everything will be ok.xx
Honestly the house isn't worth it. The emotional, psychological toll of fighting over who lives in the house just isn't worth if for the kids and for you. Yes you married a selfish man. Now it's time to make a clean break and start fresh. Let him buy you out. Run while you still have your sanity.
I'm sorry I have no advice but jee he came back got a spare mattress out for you and is sound asleep in your bed? What a piece of work... It's not going to be easy dealing with somebody as ridiculous as that. And you'll be so much better off when youre not dealing with that rubbish anymore.
Start arranging mediation NOW. You'll have to go through mediation to divide up the marital assets and work out custody. The fact that you've paid most of the mortgage repayments means nothing. It's considered to be the marital asset pool for the period you were together. Bills got paid out of it and the mortgage got paid out of it. Now the marital assets need to be divided evenly between you. This process might not go the way either of you envision, but it's necessary before you can file for divorce (after your twelve month separation).