I'm just curious on what other parents think a suitable age is for children to get themselves ready and off to school on their own.
A friend I am close with let's her 6 and 8 year old get themselves ready and off to school while she stays in bed. She mentioned this when she was complaining that her daughter keeps forgetting her lunch and the school keeps calling. Her daughter is the 6 year old so I really think it shouldn't be her responsibility for such a young child. The school is a 20 minute walk away and they live in one of the suburbs that is well known for not being safe. I live their too so I know what the streets are like.
Given that my friend stays in bed is mind boggling to me.
Before I mention my opinion to her I would love to hear what other mums do and what's normal.
My babies are under 3 so I haven't experienced the whole school thing yet.
9 Replies
I think it's to young.! My kids are in year 9 and grade 4 and I still make their lunches and take them to school every day.
Way too young! I think it's ok for the kids to pack bags and get themselves ready but they need supervision to do that and it needs to be checked they are doing it. By 6 my kid could make his own cereal, pack bag, brush teeth, get dressed, etc. independently but needed occasional reminders. I think in this day and age I wouldn't let a 6 and 8 year old walk to school alone unless it was across the road!
I stay in bed while my daughter gets herself up, makes breaky (cereal and milk), gets dressed and brushes her own hair and watches a bit of TV. I know people don't agree I let her do this but I'm a single mum and work hard and work long hours and work late at night. My daughter wakes very eArly. I usually wake up an hour after her and make sure her bag is packed correctly and put her hair up (I usually make her lunch up the night before). I Know she's not old enough yet to remember everything she needs for the day and I would not trust her walking to school by herself even though I live in a safe neighbourhood and it's literally a 2 min walk!! Like other said this day and age it's just not safe even if her kids were 12 they can still be abducted by a grown adult. I wouldn't say anything to her to be honest....I don't see it ending well. Perhaps call the kids school and voice concerns to teachers and ask for guidance, they may be happy to talk to her and just say the kids had mentioned something. She may not think she is doing anything wrong as her kids may appear very mature to her etc.
My kids age 6 and 10 get them self breakie (nothing cooked) get dressed eldest dies her hair and brushes teeth and packs her school bag. But I'm up most of the time anyway. It's good to teach them some independence. But I wouldn't let them get themself to school, probably won't until they are in high school
We live a 15 minute walk from the school and if bub allows it i stay in bed for a bit while \ my 6 year old gets up and makes his own breakfast and gets dressed but i get up do his lunch and drive him to school my 13 year old was still being driving to school. I think it's way too young to walk to school or get up and make there own lunch and remember to take it
Mine are 7, 8 & 10.(turned this in the later part of the year) I get up between 5:30 and 6 every morning. I make there lunch but my kids have to
:- make their own breakfast as in toast or cereal, (if they want porridge I make that for them)
pick their snacks and put it into their lunch bags
Pack their school bags (I always double check they have their hats)
Get their clothes out and on
Make their beds.
Depending on the day and weather they then ride / scooter to school together. We live 900m from the school on the same street.
That being said every morning I double check they have everything they need and I stand and watch them as they go up the road.
I think kids need to be given chores and taught responsibility.
However, i do think that staying in bed and making a 6 and 8 year old solely responsible is not right. My kids do it but I oversee.
20min walk is a little much on their own too.
My husbands mum was the same as your friend, now as a grown man with children of his own he really resents her. He said he would sometimes be in trouble at school for forgetting homework ect... He has also mentioned that she never drove him to school and was always in bed! He has said he would never do that to our kids because it felt like she didn't care about his education/ well being (although I'm sure that's not the case, but he can't help the way he feels)
i think its actually illegal in some states for children not to be with a parent or guardian to and from school up until the age of 12, maybe look into that, but no way would i let my kids that age get ready and go to school on their own especially living in a suburb of a city
I remember sitting at a park when I was 16 and this woman who was incredibly feral and little crazy just placed her three young children on the seat I was sitting on and said can u just watch them sweetie I have to go poo! And off she went! tthe oldest was 6 and the youngest was only about 18 months. The younger two ran off to play while the oldest chatted to me. She started telling me how she goes to school and she hates it because she doesnt like getting ready and having to help her little sister (5) and walking all by themselves! I asked her where her mum was in the morning and she told me in bed and they are not allowed to wake her up. It was the saddest thing ever!! The little girl looked so sad! The whole time I sat there in between chasing after the 18 month old id never met, she told me all about it. Their mum didnt return til like 30 mins later and im pretty sure she was on drugs. And i probably should of called the police but i was only 16 and had no idea what to do other than make sure none of them ran off, or fell off the play ground, or got hit by a car. But I just think its crap such young children are expexted to be responsible for themselves. Yes, teaching them independence is important, but far out its a mums job to take care of them! I would be at least supervising and reminding them not to forget lunch hat and drink bottle and no way would I let them walk through a rough neighborhood alone! Then to complain she forgets her lunch omg! don't you want to just say well why dont you get out of bed and make sure she has it??!! It sounds pretty lazy to me!