So I see all the time "even if so and so had walked in during the middle of labour, you/I wouldn't have cared". But if family/friends you didn't ask to be there walked in during the middle of your labour WOULD you have cared?
Lol I know if anyone but my husband (and medical staff) had walked into the room I probably would have screamed at them to get out - and I don't make a sound during labour. I may be half naked, pooing myself and all sorts of stuff but I don't want the whole world seeing me like that!
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I just was told the same thing when considering a photographer.
Yes I may not know who came or went ( professionals) towards the end and I was fine with that, but non professionals, yes it really would have upset me if someone had been there uninvited, whether I realized at the time or not. My family came to the hospital and phoned and the midwife told me they're right outside can they come in and I said no. I really didn't like that they were right outside and hearing me.
As for getting a photographer still unsure, I do think I won't like having any extra people there. Same goes with my child, who wants to be there, but then she'd need a care... another person I don't want there.
One of my childhood friends was visiting over the time leading up to my labour and obviously during it as well.
I'm not sure we ever clearly invited her to be there, but did not specifically say we didn't want her to be in the room. We actually didn't want her in the room but didn't know how to tell her that.
It was terrible :-(
So in the end she was there the whole bloody time excel for one stage where she left because she couldn't handle the blood or something, but then she came back!
The midwife actually accidentally went to hand her thebaby first instead of my husband!
My advice, if you don't want other people in there then make yourself clear from early on! Or if you don't know how to tell people no then tell your midwife the situation and have her tell everyone they can't come in (during labour) she can just say sorry it's family only! They don't mind being the tough one that has to say no to people so you don't have to!
I had an ex boyfriend show up during my labour (not the babies father) it was weird!!!!! The nurses didn't let anyone in the room without my permission ever and even asked before med students were allowed in. Of course the ex was told to leave.
Anyway I've never heard of anyone saying that.
HELL YES I WOULD HAVE CARED!!!
Originally during the time I was in labour it was only going to be me and hubby until I was 13 hrs in and turned to him saying I want my mum, after that my mum came in, then a few house later my MIL was found waiting outside so she ended up being their aswell. In the end Iam greatful for them being their bcos when everything went bad they where their to support myself and hubby. My dad ended up meeting me while I was being wheeled out of surgery lol it was a family affair.
There was only 2 people that I ever wanted in there with me one was my husband and the other was my mum, mum was in there for the beginning part with my first ended up being a emergancey c section and she left as soon as hubby got to the hospital and she was the only one there with my second as hubby didn't get there in time yet another emergency c section, granted I did tell the midwives that they were the only 2 non professionals allowed in at the time, had no problems with students being there as they have to learn but for other family and friends no way
I'm a midwife, and I work regularly in birth suite. I'm shocked at some of the answers to this question! Who just turns up to your labour uninvited??! And what kind of midwives would just let people walk in without your explicit permission??! Unless it's an emergency of course, and it's obstetric/paediatic/midwifery staff to assist. About a year ago our unit brought in new restrictions regarding visiting and support people in birth suite. Now we only allow each woman to have 2 support people. And there is no visiting in birth suite (except under particularly special circumstances). We request that people wait a coiple of hours until mum and bahy have been koved to the ward. At first I thought this was a bit harsh but now I realise it was a good move. Less chit chat, more focus on the woman and keeping her calm and able to relax, and fewer distractions in the form of people coming and going (to get food, toilet trips, make phone calls, and smoking breaks). All that interruption hinders the natural progress of labour. And from my own point of view, the midwives spend less time running to and from the desk answering the door buzzer. It used to take up too much of our precious time that we should have been spending by our woman's side. I know birth is very special, and people want to share it, but we need to keep a woman's best interests at heart, not everyone else's.
And yes, I absolutely would have cared if someone unexpected walked in while I was labouring or birthing. I know we tend to lose our inhibitions in birth suite, but that's because we know it's a safe place to do so, and you trust that people are only going to be there if they're invited or needed. Everyone is different though, and I suppose it would depend who it was walking in.
I was adamant on only having my mum and husband in the room when I was in labour. My dad, sisters in law and best friend came in smack bang in the middle and I was in so much pain I didn't even care the slightest!