Hi IMs,
I'd love your advice and thoughts on my current situation.
I've been married for 15 years and have two teenagers.
My husband has been unfaithful and was close to leaving me for another woman. He moved out and we had started the process of separating.
He now is sorry and wants to come home. He suffers from depression and is on medication.
I love him but feel broken and sad. I feel insecure and unsure how to proceed.
4 Replies
Hugs x
I was in your position 18months ago. We have been happily married (or so I thought) for 13 years with 3 beautiful children. I found out when I caught him kissing one of my best friends. We started counciling straight away, and finally, after insisting for months it was just a drunken kiss, he admitted to a full fledged affair and to many other indiscretions throughout our relationship. I was disgusted and had no idea what to do. I knew I still loved him but I hated him at the same time. He insisted he loved me and would do anything he could to make it up too me, and he did! Everything I asked of him he did, and after countless hours of marriage counselling and him seeing a psycologist we have managed to work things out. I still have bad days when I am extremely emotional but on a whole our relationship is stronger than it was before. We are both committed to each other and our family. Infidelity is a very sensitive subject and you are bound to get varying opinions of what you should do, but unfortunately only you and your husband will know what to do in your situation. Just know that if you choose to work it out there is hope. Find the right people to help you - we couldn't have done it by ourselves. And if the too of you are both willing to put in the hard work who knows what is possible. It's not an easy road but it can be a worthwhile one. Good luck x
Hi, I wanted to thank you for your response to this question. This wasn't my question but i am going through a very similar situation to you and although it's only been 5 months since finding out i am still so utterly heartbroken, soul shattered, deeply depressed, too many emotions to list.. I know i love my husband as he is doing everything possible to repair the damage but after 5 months i still dont feel the love towards him. I feel nothing.. No hate but no love. I thought my life was perfect before this. I was so happy and in love. Anyway i wanted to thank you because most comments i read are to leave the relationship immediately, it was refreshing to read your comment and know there are couples out there who work through it and come out the other side. Although sometimes it hurts so much i just feel like giving up, Your comment gave me some hope.. Thank you xxx
Don't let him home until you go through couples counselling together. If he won't do it then tell him where to go!
I have never been married so I can answer your question personally, however im currently working through infidelity in my own relation ship which is no where near as long as yours but I can tell you its hard work and after a year I still have days where I would gladly see the back of him.
My mother has been in her relationship for a about 15 years and 7 in it came out about a bunch of affairs. Some how they have managed to make it work, lots of counselling was involved. They are now married.