My hubby works away and when he comes home, we are trying to conceive. He works hard and we have a great lifestyle. I also work so things are ok, or so I thought.
I suspected that he was spending money on gaming and noticed some discrepancies on bank statements. I also noticed that he has a second phone. He says that it's his business phone because he wants to keep everything separate but since I do the books, I queried the bill.
After a massive argument, I found out that he is doing Ice and helps a few of his friends with drop offs and pick ups. I flipped my nut. He thinks he's not addicted and because he isn't selling or "knows what's in the package," that he isn't drug trafficking or a dealer.
This flat out terrifies me. He seems to think it's ok because his mates pay him for his time and that we as a family benefit from it. I almost threw up.
He knows that I am disappointed, freaked out, and angry. He swears that he only does it when he "needs" to but promises he will stop that. With the trafficking, I am not sure. When I told him that what he was doing was so stupid, crazy and illegal that if our oldest child were to traffick drugs and wonder why he's in jail in Bali, I would hit his father with a bat and call the police. My husband agreed and I must of lost it because I slammed the phone down and refused to pick up after.
I am so upset and worried. I am pretty sure that I told him not to come home. I'm not sure what to do but I have not spoken to anyone and my first gut instinct is pack up the kids, move and call the police. I do love my husband and our family but just not sure what to do.
I'm sorry for the novel but anyone who could help me, any advice would be welcomed.
9 Replies
I would say your first reaction is the right one!
Your husband has been hiding illegal activities. He isn't just taking ice (an incredibly dangerous drug that changes who you are) but has taken things much much further than that. Run now, I wouldn't trust him as far as I could throw him!
Do not speak to him, get out now!! Ice is so dangerous and can cause the person to flip out violently.
Move, call police and end all contact before its too late, please i beg of you stay safe!!!
I have been in your shoes before. I left him and he is still using and dealing. The thing that put the nail in the coffin, was somewhere in his half truths he told the full truth that he had had someone come into one of his friends houses with guns ready to shoot everyone, I couldn't risk that same scenario happening in my house while they were trying to find him. Your reaction was normal, it is the right one. Don't second guess yourself. I would personally pack up and move while he is not there, take your precious babies and get them out of there. I have seen a side of ice I wish I hadn't known about, I know about the side that involves murders, stand overs, and people looking for him - it is scary and is often over a little amount of money that these ice addicts are wanting back because they were sold shit. Save yourself and your babies.
GET OUT...DANGEROUS!!
BIG HUGS
YOU DESERVE BETTER X
Give him a chance to change. I used to be an addict to ice and let me tell you its a drug that can turn your life upside down. Its the worst drug out there because you don't think what your doing is wrong because you only do it on the weekends or every now and then but that quickly changes and then you find yourself wanting it more and more. I'm lucky to have such a good support system to get me off it but it was hard and I'm a much better person.
My only advice is if you love your husband and he wants to change then please dont give up on him, he needs you more than ever now. But if he doesn't want to or see's that he doesn't have a problem then leave. Because he has to want to change and that means no longer associating with people who still use the drug. Good luck and I wish you the very best x
You want to pack the kids, move and call the police? Jesus thats a bit dramatic isnt it? Why dont you just sit dpwn and explain your concerns with him..
You want to pack the kids, move and call the police? Jesus thats a bit dramatic isnt it? Why dont you just sit dpwn and explain your concerns with him..
Your husband is not only a drug addict, he is a drug dealer. How do you feel about that? You in or out?
I know it's not what you want to hear but it needs to be said. My mum and dad did the stuff. It was the worst years of my life. My mum ended up trying to kill me when she was off her face! I ended up getting taken off them by dcs. You need to do what's right. I understand you love him and I guarantee there's struggles lying ahead either way but you will find your feet and one day you will look back and be proud of yourself for doing the smart thing! If your husband is telling the truth and isn't addicted he will soon clean up his act so you can trust him enough to let him back into your life!