Hi mums,
Im a single mum and I'm feeling a bit sad in the lead up to Mother's Day. It seems like every mum around me have supportive partners and keep talking to me about the presents they are going to receive and things being planned for them. They're all great mums and deserve the recognition for their hard work.
While I know I'm not the only single mum in the world, I don't know how to turn this feeling of sadness around. I love my darling son so much, I've always raised him alone and I work really hard to raise him, but it'd be really nice to have someone to just say 'you're doing a great job' or something similar. What do other single mums do to turn this around? To make this day a fun day? A different mind set? Activities? I've been trying to teach him to cook porridge for Mother's Day breakfast but he is only 5yrs old and moderately physically disabled so it's quite a hard task for both of us. Thanks :)
6 Replies
I'm kind of in the same boat. I've been on my own for 20 years with my disabled son. Luckily my mum is awesome. So I give her some money to take my son shopping for a present. She helps him wrap it up so it is ready to unwrap in the morning.
Because my son has a form of hypersomnia (sleeps incredibly long periods and can't wake him up) I do my own breakfast. This year I'm planning on waffles. You can buy them premade so I just have to toast them, add icecream and syrup. Yummy
I try and do things to pamper myself. Like give myself a facial, take a really long shower. If we can we will catch up with family later in the day.
I do know how you feel, I feel bad until I remember that there are women with crap partners and husbands who make no effort and then I feel lucky because I'm single :)
Just remember other people only show the front they want, its not a whole picture so don't compare. I have a friend who is miserable with her husband and exhausted with doing everything with her child. She'll post on fb all her presents and how joyful and blesses she is. SHE goes out and buys her own presents, wraps them, then opens them and says thanks Husband and child. They will have bickered their way through breakfast And she'll be super angry and unappreciated, but her other friends would never know know.
When I was single I did Think about my ex and lack of someone else there, but I turned my thoughts around to enjoying my child, our bond, and actually take time to congratulate yourself on the awesome job you do!! Takeyourself and him out for a special breakfast together. Enjoy your day. I left the craft gift she made in school in her school bag and got it out on Sunday morning. That hand painting and Card were just beautiful I wouldn't want anything else and she was so proud, it made my whole day.(he'll probably do something at school, but if not put him to work on Sunday and make something together)
I really hope you have a happy mothers day!! You deserve it!!!
I think mothers day is over materialised. My partner never did mothers day in the end it hurt but then I just realised to make the most of the day with my children, without my son I wouldn't be a mum the greatest gift is being able to see his smile and laughter. Do something special with your child (when he wakes up :) while his asleep have your breaky a nice relaxing bath if you can do you hair and makeup or sit down with a cuppa and a book. Don't forget to give yourself a pat on the shoulder being a single mum is hard.
What I do is make pancakes the night before and leave them in the fridge, the kids grab them out and give them to me. My daughter (now at school) will buy something from the Mother's Day stall (my parents always sneak her a little extra cash for it to or my mum will take her out shopping). We do what ever for the day and then at the end I run myself a bath and sit in there.
I don't get breakfast and I don't expect presents, but my brother and mother usually buy my son something to give to me (best family ever!) But what makes my day is waking up to see my babys beautiful face looking down at me, with a massive smile and he says "I love you mummy". That feeling is better than any other, and every day, even if he has been driving me crazy, I still look forward to seeing that smile, hearing those words and feeling that cuddle. I used to get jealous on mothers day, but the only thing my jealousy done was make me bitter to a little boy who loves me unconditionally. Even as he gets older, I don't need money spent on me, I don't need to be full, I just need to know that everything I do is appreciated and that he loves me, and he does that every day. I don't need a day to tell me I should be getting spoilt, because I get spoilt 7 days a week, with something more valuable than any present.
It's the small things that count :-) xxx
Im not a single mum but every year since becoming a mum my partner has made it a horrible day for me the first year my mum and sister had to buy me a present because 'I'm not his mum' and last year he kicked me and the kids out of our home on Mother's Day! You need to remember that you know your doing an amazing job and that's the main thing you shouldn't need someone else to validate that for you even though it probably would be nice! Go out and spoil yourself and your kids because you deserve it!