Im feeling very deflated..
my partner n i have 5 kids between us i have 4, ages 18 16 10 & 8, he has 1 aged 14.
all we do is fight over kids. thats it. nothing else.
He came home to stay with us because he had a new job and needed somewhere to stay.. this was the start. now i know my son isnt perfect. he smoke pot. goes out partying, comes home in his loud car at stupid hours, usually on the weekends though, ive spoke to him dozens if times, but it seems like everything else he does is not good enough. There is always something my partner whinges about.. He has a full time job, works very long hours. Pays board. He a good kid other than the pot. Which he doesn't bring home. Its against our rules.
My partner wants him out.. Says he's an adult he should be fending for himself, evertime i say i just cant kick him out on the street. I cant do that. he my child. Why can't he see him as my child and not another adult who just dumped himself on us.. . It like he wants me to choose.
My kids have separate rules to his. And this is really upsetting me and the kids. They see that his daughter gets away with murder for things that they would have consequences for.. I have a rule that at the End of the weekEnd or friday night or Saturday morning we all jump in and give the house a good clean up. It takes a couple of hours. But we get to enjoy our weekend. The kids aren't allowed to lleave for sleep overs or go anywhere till Its done.. But it seems only one person is immune to helping. Every single time.. If i even breath her name is its a shit fight and im picking on her. I cant talk to her because im soo scared that if i offend her she'll dob on me.. She whinges and tells dad. Ive even read messages from her saying i have no rights.. And then that's it.. Its on. I know nothing about her, nothing about school, nothing about her life, i don't even know where she goes ob weekends. I know im not the parent. I back off and make ni major decisions. But i do everything else cook cleaning washing. But that's as far as my involvment with her.. Ive made efforts to be her friend but its not working. Bought an i Phone which she told my 16 yr old was shit and she wants a better one. I've include Her in girly outings. I want to be in her life and i want us to be close. But i feel like its no use. I love my partner so much. But we aren't doing so well as a blended family
Is it time for me to move on.. Do i just put this in the too hard basket
How can we blend more
How can we blend more
Posted in:
Kids, Teenagers, Tips and Advice
3 Replies
I'd go to mates I've counselling before walking away. If he won't go to counselling then I'd separate immediately. You both need to be on the same page and it sounds like you aren't even on the same bookshelf.
It's very hard! My husband & I have been together 11 years. He had a 4 year old. I've never clicked with him. We now have 2 children of our own & it's so hard. Our lives always revolve around him. His mother & siblings. My kids have never met these people but we can't go on holidays because his sisters at her dads etc. I love my husband dearly & have tried to love his son. He just won't & hadn't let me in. Too much brain washing from the son. Try to make it work. Talk when not angry or upset. Tell him your son is staying & if he doesn't like it. There's the door.
She sounds like a little bitch and your partner sounds like a doosh, sorry! Dont kick your son out thats terrible. Id be kicking him and his daughter out!