We can't decide whether to have a second child. I know that if we go ahead and do it we won't regret it for a second and it would be an amazing gift. But......
I'm 38, my husband is in his mid-forties and we both work full-time. Our 3yr old is in daycare.
Not sure if we feel like we have the time and energy for a second. Financially we're comfortable at the moment and having a second would put a strain on that.
Our little boy is happily socialised with friends at childcare, our own friend's children and neighbours so we're not worried about that aspect of it.
I guess what I want to hear about are the real stories of having a second. I want to hear how much hard work it is for working parents. I really want the reality and the facts before we make a decision. I know that each of you that have been down this road wouldn't change it for the world, but is there anything you wish you'd known before you went for round two?
Thanks in advance for your honesty and understanding. xx
4 Replies
These are the questions that I asked myself:
Do I really want to do sleepless nights, and dirty nappies again?
My answer was no lol I love kids and love my son, if someone gave me a 4 year old I'd thank them very nicely, but I got to the point where I knew I didn't have it in me to do it all again.
We just had our second and yes I won't lie it is a little bit more difficult at the start. But once you recover from the birth and start getting back into a routine it is fine, it's busier but everyone just learns to adjust. It was so beautiful to give our child a sibling. We know 2 is enough for us and it's nice knowing they will grow up together, play together, get excited for Santa together, Easter bunny etc. things that kids can share - not saying adults can't share these things just that kids share them in a different way
I have number two, I.also said hell no to.sleepless nights and dirty nappies, I prefer kids to the baby stage anyway. And I was also.very happy with how things were with my four year old, settled and eas. I had a great pregnancy so that went by just fine. Having the second is hard work, but once I.knew I committed a fee years to this baby and just focus on the fact that by time she's three everything will be settled again. So I am giving this time. I don't think it's possible to have a baby and not. One thing I wish I.knew was how much life would change For and with the eldest. I have time for the baby, I have no time for her. Yes I can plan quality time, but on general no, I don't have half an.hour to watch her brush teeth, or get dressed, I'm trying not to say quickly, faster, come on all the timE. I had a beautiful relationship with her and.shes a.lovely child but it's so har. To keep that while the next ones new, there's not time for.much else at all.
It's hard at the start but now it all just works. My little ones play and interact and it melts my heart. I thought my child was socialised too but now realise it's nothing compared to having a sibling.