Hi ladies, we just found out we're having another boy. I love our little boy and know I will love the next one but I would really like a girl. How do you deal with this? We were only going to have two children but now are thinking about having three.
I'm seriously thinking of travelling to another country to guarantee the next (and last baby) would be a girl. Has anyone done this? Did it work? What was involved? There is a centre in Sydney that has a reputable sister centre in Thailand that we would probably look into.
Gender Disappoinment / Gender Selection
Gender Disappoinment / Gender Selection
Posted in:
Pregnancy
8 Replies
That's a very expensive and controversial decision.
Boys are lovely. Girls are so much hard work. But a baby is a baby. I didn't find out what sex my 7month old was because I thought I would be disappointed if it was a boy, and just wanted to enjoy my pregnancy. In the delivery room when I found out she was a girl, I was majorly underwhelmed.
It's just a gender. They're still your children no matter what sex they are.
I didn't find out the sex of my 2nd my partner really wanted a girl however I was
Much happier to have 2 boys! I knew I was having a boy and have no regrets however I feel pressure to have another for my partner I was just happy to have 2 happy and healthy boys! Be blessed with what u have there is no garuntee u will get a girl after spending all that money !!
I just had my second boy and felt the same at first when I was pregnant and found out, however as my pregnancy went on I started to find reason that two boys close in age would be great and concentrated on them ie, same interests, clothes, toys, hobbies ect. Once he was born I was so happy to have my 2 boys. I will however have a 3rd hoping its a girl but if its another boy I have prepared myself going in so I won't find out the sex of he next 1 and will just say its a boy so if it is a girl it will be a great surprise and if its a boy I won't have all pregnancy to think about it or for ppl to say oh another boy (because a lot of ppl seem to make this comment even complete strangers). At the end of the day u will live any baby regardless of sex but I completely understand waning a girl however I personally wouldn't go and do gender selection. Good luck
I could have written your comment! Lol. If we have a third we also won't find out gender because I found myself getting angry at people who "felt sorry for me" because I was having another boy. Like you couldn't possibly be satisfied with two boys. To the OP you need to think about how would you feel if it was another boy and how would he feel if he knew that you were disappointed he wasn't a girl. Good luck with your decision x
This is a tough one.
OK I think a lot of people do have a gender preference even if they don't admit it publicly. So I understand you have a preference and believe you will love your baby no matter what it is.
However, and this is where it gets tricky lol
There is a normal for want of a better word level of preference, and an extreme. If you are prepared to go to these lengths/expense of having an extra child and travel internationally to do it, I am concerned your level might be a bit on the extreme side.
So, given that, I'd be asking yourself, how will you feel if even after all this effort/expense it's another boy? I'm sure it's not guaranteed. How will you feel? Is it's possible you could get PND ? (though I'm sure again your a loving person and would ultimately love your third boy).
My other question is, if you are lucky enough to get your girl, will you treat her the same (well not the same as all kids are different, but I'm sure you know what I mean). I mean REALLY ask yourself if you will treat her the same, and your boys will KNOW they are equally loved and valued.
If you can't be really sure of these two things, I'd stick with your boys and love them as I am sure you do and be greatful for their miracle. Most people don't get the luxury of choice, I have three girls, but I wouldn't have it any other way either. People used to assume with the last one I wanted a boy, but I really didn't care. I know a family of seven girls! lol
Given your in a financial position to get a choice obviously, I don't think that should necessarily be denied you, but I would look inside yourself with honesty first.
Good luck though with whatever you decide and hopefully someone else has the answers to your questions as in the process and success.
Following!! I have 3 beautiful sons and would dearly love to try once more for a daughter. My issue is convincing my hubby to have a 4th
I know someone who spent $16,000 to get a girl in Thailand and did not fall pregnant. She was devastated and very out of pocket. She regretted it.
I have three little boys aged 4.5,3 and 20 months, I also get a lot of comments about poor me having three boys and no girl and to be quite honest yes a girl would have been lovely but I wouldn't change having my boys for anything, I don't believe the sex should be important when having a baby as long as they are healthy. that being said we found out about 5 months ago that we are expecting no. 4 and have recently found out that it is a girl this time, we did not do anything to 'get' this as it was not planned and whilst I am excited that its a girl I would have been just as happy for another boy. good luck with whatever you choose but if you haven't had this baby yet you need to give yourself time to cherish and love this one before you decide to have another.