I don't even know if there's an answer to any of this but here goes... Sorry for the novel:
We have an 18 month old child who is amazing and so loved. We do okay financially, my partner works but it's only casual. He gets full time hours but we have no security that his job is reliable. I want another baby so badly, I don't want a big age gap no more than 4 years and I feel like I'm running out of time. I've been looking for work for the last year. Wanted to get into a full time role so I could have another baby take 3 months off and have a job to go back to. I've finally started a full time job however, it's contract so I have no benefits. If I get half way through the contract and decide to fall pregnant then I seal the deal that my contract won't be renewed and I won't have a job after another baby and it's already taken me so long to get work but there's also the fact that if I don't try for number 2 I'm going to continue having this feeling that my family is incomplete.
I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else has been here? What would you do? This is all I think about.
2 Replies
Only you can decide. It maybe that you decide that only 1 child is financially viable at this time (revisit later if age isn't an issue). It's ok to have one or have a bigger gap. We just can't have everything work out the way we want sometimes. That's just how life works. I know what it's like to really want a child now, I've been there but trust me the feeling does pass and you can get through and be ok. I got to the point where I was ok with my one, and my son isn't sad or lonely, he has friends and now has reached the age where playing with siblings would be very uncool anyway. I'm sure there are only children who think they would have been better off having a sibling but in the scheme of things I'm sure they would prefer they were fed, clothed and parents weren't working 24/7 just to survive.
Oh babe! Me too! We will never hVe a good paying job! We survive on about 50000 combined and have a 20 month old, we still travel a lot as that's out priority, but I want two so bad but am going back and forth if it's a smart idea! :/ iv decided if I don't fall in the next 3 months that's it for me (I'm only 28 ) I misscarried 6 months ago or so and I didn't even think partner wanted two but changed his mind after bubs any way that means iv been coming to terms with only having one for a few years now and I have to say it was inconceivable at the start and now I'm the one contemplating 1! There are so many advantages to one kid!!! Think a lot about them and over time it helps, or have your second and just make ends meet with a happy lol family :) xx