Apologies in advance for the essay...
I feel like I am on the inevitable path to a divorce. It doesn't seem to matter what we do but we both end up feeling the same sense of falling out of love with one another and preferring to spend time by ourselves. I can honestly say that neither of us would be together if it wasn't for our daughter.
We've done counselling, him being controlling and physical abuse. We've overcome obstacles such as me cheating (over the top flirting when drunk with one guy and flirty texts with same guy, however regardless of what has happened it feels like we're back to square one.
We have felt like this before prior to my cheating and we went to counselling for this. It did help and so we have been practicing this since. When I cheated the aftermath made us evaluate our relationship and we became closer. We currently talk regularly, go on regular dates, have sex enough (4-7 times a week so he can't complain!), don't have any financial worries and are both in jobs we enjoy. So no major stresses.
Now, although we are still practicing what the counsellor said and are a better team than before, this feeling is coming back and I'm at a loss to what to do. Hubby won't go to counselling anymore as he thinks our issues between us are sorted. So I'm at a loss for what to do. Just wait, continue on and see if we get to the same point?
Have you ever felt like this? What have you done to fix it? What happened in the end?
2 Replies
I think it's impossible to be in love with someone 100% of the time. I think falling in and out of love is totally normal.
Totally agree with above poster, relationships go through heaps of ups and downs it can't be perfect 100% of the time unfortunately, I have struggled with the same issues that you've described and I have stuck it out through the good and bad, I have really tried focussing on all the positive things in our relationship/life not the negative things, when you really think about it out minds overpower us with all the BAD things, and cloud all the great moments together and why you fell in love with each other, you need to sit down and write out all the good and bad things in your relationship and what you expect in a new one if you left, and also picture how you would feel seeing him with another woman and sharing custody of your child, divorcing always looks like a easy way out but can be the biggest mistake of your life, I hope you can work it out all the best