Hello.
I have 1 child and 3 stepchildren and recently discovered I am pregnant.
My partner is very supportive and very loving I have no complaints in that regard. He is such an amazing man and father to all of our children.
My question is for other expecting mothers who have experienced prenatal depression? I think I have it.
I am in no way at all excited about this pregnancy. In fact I resent it. I am unhappy about the fact that I am pregnant and I have considered abortion. I already feel run off my feet with the 4 we have and I'm not sure how I will cope with a 5th child.
People keep saying it's my hormones playing up. Which I believe to be true, I've never been so tired and unmotivated in my whole life. But my fear is, what if my feeling don't change. What if I can't love this child. What's wrong with me? :'(
I'm not a selfish person. I don't believe in abortion so that's not an option for me at all, although I've considered it I could never do it. I love my son and step children and my partner is enough. I don't need or want a baby to complete us.
Please don't be nasty, I am really struggling here and I need help to feel good about this and accept my fate. I need to be reassured that everything will be ok and nothing my partner says can do that.
The last time I was pregnant, my mother was dying a slow and horrible death through my entire pregnancy, and she died when my son was only a few weeks old. This may have something to do with my feelings on a psychological level?
Please help me.
4 Replies
Honey, please don't delay in seeing your GP about your feelings. I know that feeling of a surprise pregnancy, for me it was scary and I was just so very sad. I too considered abortion but realised it wasn't for me (but I'm pro choice). I actually used to pray that I had a miscarriage, I know that sounds terrible, and women who are struggling with infertility or who have experienced a miscarriage will think I'm a terrible person.
It's also very likely as you say bringing up feelings regarding your mothers passing.
So although I believe you will start to love, and look forward to your future with this new baby, just as I did mine (and he really is my life) there is no harm in seeking help and it will give you a support person in your life who can really listen.
I had it as well with my daughter along with anxiety. I felt exactly as you did now. I was put on bed rest for ten weeks due to bleeding so that didn't help my state of mind either. Please talk to your gp and try to figure out the best plan of action for you.
My daughter is now one and a half and I have the most amazing relationship with her. She's an awesome little girl even with all of the sleep deprivation and exhaustion she's created for me, I honestly didn't think after having pre natal depression that I would bond with her as well as I have so I understand exactly how you're feeling! I have two older children as well so I worried about coping as well but somehow I've managed so I have faith you will too! Best of luck to you x
Thanks for those tips. I'm so tired as well and my hormonal levels are abnormally high. All is well with baby after an ultrasound yesterday and dr says some women just have high hormone levels with no harm to baby. But I know it's playing havack with my wellbeing :( thank you for your non judging and positive replies xxxx
I spoke to a psychologist during my pregnancy, it was very beneficial to have someone outside of my life to vent and pour out my emotions to. I got a mental health plan from my gp.