Disgusting act of bullying- what to do?
My daughter has been the subject of some pretty serious bullying this year, from 1 child in particular (C1). Everything from telling her friends they're not allowed to talk to her, to demanding money, to writing 'I hate (insert my child's name)' in other children's notebooks, telling her she has a treat from her then putting dirt in her mouth. Today is beyond anything I can conceve though, C1 uriniated in a cup and told my daughter it was juice and to drink it. My child took a sip and spat it out.
To make matters worse, apparently the whole class and teacher knew about it and I wasn't informed (substitute teacher- the regular teacher has been informed a number of times about the bullying that has taken place, & has acted on it in the past)! Two parents contacted me separately to tell me- I was horrified. I have spoken to the parents of C1, & they were also in shock & have taken the matter very seriously (not the first conversation I've had with them about C1 bullying my child, and they have always dealt with it the best way they can).
My question is, what would you do? At the moment I am thinking the most extreme of measures because I am highly emotional. My child is so badly affected by it, she refuses to talk about it. What would be a reasonable request to make to the school about this? How do I address that the teacher knew and I wasn't contacted?
Btw, my child is 7 years old and C1 is 8 years old.
8 Replies
Speak to the principal! But honestly I'd be seriously considering a change of school. I'd be raising hell over the latest incident!!!!!
I'd be lodging a complaint with the education department regarding the substitute teacher!
Go above the teacher, clearly they aren't doing anything to fix the situation. Try talking to the Guidance Officer, Deputy Principal, or even the Principal. If your child wont talk to you about it, maybe she will open up to either the Guidance officer or the school Chaplain.
Demand the C1 child be moved to another class and receive some sort of counselling or be expelled. The parents sounds like they are acting shocked and expressing concern, but are probably actually not doing anything about it. Are they teaching C1 empathy, consequences and manners, have they tried to find a reason for this behaviour? Failing that, teach your daughter to defend herself. Maybe C1 parents might actually try to manage their childs behaviour , when said child continually comes home with a black eye cause your daugher stick s up for herself.
My dd aged 9 was also bullied this year. I repeatedly spoke to her teacher who was no help at all. She was verbally and physically bullied and it just broke my heart, I demanded an appt with principal and I have to say he was fantastic. I was under no illusion that the bullying would immediately stop but I warned them I would not tolerate any more physical incidents. I also spoke to dept of education who were happy to step in should I want them to. I also spoke to police because as far as I was concerned the bully was assaulting my daughter and they were also happy to speak to the child should I wish to go ahead with a complaint. I was already to take that step if it didn't stop. My daughter was hit, kicked, poked and had rocks thrown at her but it took the bully telling my daughter she was fat that reduced her to tears. I considered taking her out of the school but she had special friends there and ultimately who wins then. Certainly not my daughter. I'm happy to say with constant updates from the school it has now stopped - touch wood. They would get my girl to go to the office every Friday for a how are you doing chat. Your poor girl. - go to the office and raise hell if you need to. The school has a duty of care to your daughter that she needs to feel safe at school. If they can't provide that then there are other steps for you to take. Personally I would not be speaking to the bully's parent as that can backfire on you. I never approached the mother of my daughters bully as I knew I would just flip my shit and it would all come out wrong. Good luck and I hope you get it all sorted.
It is a very serious incident and as a parent legally im fairly certain you should have been contacted immediately when both children in the principles office. Id be asking for a meetibg with the principal and teacher abd tellibg them to their faces you are putting in a complaint with the board of education as the bullying is not being dealt with appropriately and especially with the last incident as thats your childs health and safty. Its disgusting and you need to put your fiot down. As lovely as the parents may be promising you they will deal with it its not happening and im a huge believer that kids learn this behavior somewhere monkey see monkey do. You don't know what happens at their house.
I think it's absolutely disgusting! Your poor child!!! I was bullied physically in kindy (by girls in year 2) and on and off through primary. but my parents always ignored it! Hugs and high fives for being there for your child!!!!
It needs to be reported to the relevant departments as the school will do very little. Also while I am not at all sympathising with the bullies behaviour.......but why does she think such abuse of another is ok......has she been taught this herself? Or abused herself and acting out?
Bringing it to light will not only help your own child and others victim of the bully, but possibly save the bully from her own issues. Totally get you don't want to help a bully, but an 8 year old peeing in a cup and making another drink it is more then odd!
If you change schools (I did when little) maybe take your daughter to counselling to build her back up again so she can move on and make new friends! Being bullied can crush your confidence and then making friends becomes harder! Hugs for you and your daughter !
That is horrific - I am so sorry this happened to your daughter. The other child is a disgusting pig - there's no excuse for that behaviour at that age. I would be contacting the principle and if you aren't satisfied with the results, contact the dept of education. That to me would be an act of bullying that is at expulsion level - particularly considering this is not the first time th child has been bullying