hi mums.
My husband usually works locally and as we have two babies under 3, I need his support and help when he's finished work.
Lately his work hasn't got any local jobs and he's been forced to go out of town for a week.
He can work for himself for cash as his type of job allows him to do that but that's running out low too as he's nearly finished all of them
It's day two today and he won't be back until Friday. I'm struggling so hard and so is my 3 year old. My other baby is sick and not sleeping and I feel so helpless and empty when he's not here.
I don't want him working out of town and we continually fight and argue over the fact that he has to. He says he misses us and it's worse for him but we obviously need bills paid.
I feel selfish but the days are so long, how can I make it go faster??? I'm losing my mind and don't even feel like eating.
I hate always asking my mum and mum in law to help too but sadly they are both away this week
3 Replies
The only thing I've found that helps is going out. Of course with a sick little one and a toddler, that could be easier said than done and I often find going out more stressful than anything!
I know this doesn't really help or answer your question but...why don't you change your circumstances? My husband used to work 70+ hours a week in a job he couldn't progress further in, he was also working a second job at nights and we hardly saw him. We ended up moving and now own our own business. Granted the stress hasn't left, we still struggle for money (we're less than a year into the business) BUT we know that the business will worked because we're in an area that has the opportunity for it. Is there something you or your husband could make a business out of? Could you move somewhere with greater opportunities? As hard as it can be, I sure as hell know I wouldn't change a thing. We all hated the way we were living 2 years ago and even though we have less of some things now, we are so much closer as a family and have the ability to take days off if we need to.
Sorry I went on a bit of a tangent to your question, I'm just very passionate about living in the moment and taking chances....
Good luck over the next week, I hope you get some relief soon!
Go to playgroups when you can, get out of the house and meet people, go for a walk around the block etc. go to storey time at the library, find out if your local community centre has occasional care you can book the 3 year old in cheaply. But don't pick fights with hubby about the work situation. He sounds like he is a bloody good guy making the best out of a crappy situation. It doesn't help you or him feel better or achieve anything. If your family is prepared to help out LET THEM. One week is one week and you can do it on your own. If your son likes taking baths let him take a bath for an hour while you cuddle the baby in the bathroom. You can do this
i dislike my husbands Job as it involves him being away at a week at a time, he is home occasionally for a full weekend but normally its for a night. I hate it, as his job seems more important than we do . But he looks at it as a way to provide us with the financially and set us up for the future.
I try n look at it like we are doing the hard yards now for a better future.
There was many of times I wanted to leave over the last 8 years many long nights many tears and many many days/nights thinking why me, why did I picks husband that doesn't want to be us.
I look at that I have raised the children how I wanted and its him that has missed out on life not me n the kids.
I won't deny its going to be hard but you can do this