depression and motherhood
Hi iM''s! Firstly THANK YOU for all the support prevously :) ive written in before and gotten amazing feedback so thank you.
Today I'd like to talk about the black dog, depression. I suffer with reoccurring depression and an anxiety, many due to external factors (brought on by external factors but them lingers forever!). I'm not medicated and have no interest in anti-depressants although I am looking into anxiety medication (any feedback of anti anxiety meds would be great as well!). I see a therapist but havent for over a month. So my question today is about OTHER coping methods.
What do you do when you are in absolute crisis and you cant turn to close friends/family? I was in crisis a month ago and just did not know where to turn to, I was suicidal and having panic attacks that lasted over 3 hours. I had a plan and everything. I didnt want to call lifeline ect because A) I didnt find them helpful and B) I didnt exactly want to be "talked out of it". What are our other options? I needed to see someone in person, thats what works for me, but my paychologist didnt have any appointments for a month and my week. What do YOU do? What has helped right then and there?
Everyday coping! HOW?! Everything is so f***ing overwhelming! And it just gets MORE overwhelming. I have an anxiety attack just walking into the kitchen ad im terrified og the mess that hasnt even started yet! What do you do? How do you pull yourself up? What about thr kids? I swear my 2yt old is officially addicted to tv and I cant DO anything about it. I spend forever feeling so horrible for her screen usagr that to avoid how horrible I feel the tv goes on and the cycle continues! Every abc2 song is like a knife in the guts. .. I knife I avoide wuth MORE tv and more avoidance! Playing with her ia now overwhelming and stressful... aboidance has become my offical super power (avoiding EVERYTHING, gosh fb is useful!). So what do YOU do? Everyday and when things have hit the wall??
Thank you
3 Replies
You can call an ambulance. They will just talk to you and make sure you are ok. Or can you can call your crisis mental health team. They can come out to see you. Ask your psychologist for your local crisis teams number.
Beyond blue also has online counselling support. Check out there website.
I can understand why you wouldn't want antidepressants as I had suffered from depression for 14 years before deciding I needed it! But when you are suicidal that is a time when you need to consider using them just to help with mood until you have learnt the tools to manage your depression and suicidal thoughts. Just think about it.
As mentioned I've suffered from depression for about 14 years and then anxiety when I had my baby. I did cognitive behavioural therapy but I found it didn't help in the timeframe I required. It got to a point where I didn't think i could function like this. I then started on lexapro (a medication used for anxiety and depression) and found that this was the most useful thing.
Whilst doing the psychologist appointments however apart from cbt she stressed mindfulness. It wasn't for me but perhaps you may find it more useful. Perhaps Google it and see if it seems like something that might be useful.
This is going to sound like an essay and I'm sorry but here goes.. My 4 babies were born when i was 16, 19, 30 & 32. I had severe post natal depression with ALL OF THEM, but I was not aware of what it was so had no tools to deal with it... I spent more than 20 years taking different medications for depression and hating myself for it so I would wean myself off them regularly and end up back where i started. 2 years ago i started having the most horrible anxiety attacks.. I would sweat, cry, vomit and curl up in a ball-I simply could not function. I went to a random doctor as my usual gp was unavailable.. He gave me a weeks worth of diazapam and asked me if i would be willing to talk to someone and come back in a few days.. The medication helped but I felt so numb -I hated taking it... When I went back he had contacted a place called the Lawson Clinic.. I started seeing a psychiatrist through skype every week and was eventually diagnosed with Bi Polar II and depression.. I hated finding out I would be on medication for the long term but we will adjusted it accordingly until we find the right one/dose.. When I explained how i felt about taking medication for my condition she said similar to what Mary Elizabeth said "why you would not consider being medicated for a chemical imbalance (depression or anxiety) when if you had diabetes or cholesterol you would HAVE TO medicate"... I am in a much better place and I have up & down day's but once I prepared myself for the long journey ahead things became much clearer.. It WILL NOT go away overnight, There IS a process, It WILL BE HARD, BUT IT WILL BE WORTH IT... I am not qualified but I am surviving this... I am more than willing to listen if you need a sounding board.. Sometimes I didn't need advice, I just needed someone to listen... Much Love being sent to you...xxx
P.S. TV is not the worst thing to subject your child to.. Maybe just find a different channel or borrow some dvd's... xxx (to avoid the knife in the guts feeling) (( I HATE DORA way more than ABC2))