My son is twelve years old. He has three siblings. I have always had trouble parenting him. I now suspect after doing some research that he may have aspergers.
Some things he does
Has terrible trouble going to sleep
Hates anything new (even as small as school excursion)
Outbursts over nothing (eg no shorts in his cupboard )
Hates loud noises like vacuum cleaners
Gets very anxious in crowds and usually has meltdown
Has meltdowns over the smallest thing (bigger and longer than tantrums) ie someone walking into the room and speaking
Always something wrong
Worries constantly over anything and everything
Often has pain and needs attention ie headaches, sore legs etc
Can be happy one minute and very loving - next minute with no change in circumstances can be angry, crying, violent and aggressive.
I have seen councillors in the past who just say to me to be harder on him .and that he has me wrapped around his little finger ... But I have tried every type of discipline and nothing works.
Where do people suggest I go now?
Is getting a diagnosis in my families best interest? How will it help him and us?
There is history of bi-polar and depression in the extended family. I have read up on bi-polar and don't think it matches him.
5 Replies
Since grade 3 I have been begging for help for our 12yr old (daughter), our old school said she was borderline mentally impaired and to stop expecting her to do anything at school and just let her go and have fun. We begged our GP for a referral to a developmental peadiatrican, we had to try several as many have very long waiting lists just to GET ON a waiting list. So I suggest ringing around local ones til you find one that will put you on the list now and get your gp to write the referral. After a 20min consult we were told she was depressed and referred onto CYMHS (child youth mental health service - QLD) after nearly a year there with her seeing counsellors and a few outburst at school we've finally have a diagnosis of ASD. No parent wants their child labeled with an issue but for us if it means she gets the help she needs then it was all worth it. We're medication free, working on the outbursts, temper and the struggle. We found she was well aware that she was falling further behind than her peers which was increasing her anxiety and hence her behaviours. I suggest getting your GP to refer to the developmental pead, writing a journal of when you first noticed things that were different, triggers for melt downs, if you can record one, (when ever she saw me with my phone she'd go nucelar and try to smash my phone, but she threw one with her door shut so I was able to record her through the door), emotional responses that seem off, anything and everything. Don't stop trying !!!
Hi. We have a five year old that behaves in much the same way as you have posted about your 12 year old. Your sons symptoms and our own almost match word for word. We have had our son tested by psychologists, therapist and a paediatrician. The psychologist and therapist were very quick to jump on the autism spectrum bandwagon whilst our paediatrician was somewhat hesitant. WHilst it is true he exhibits many autistic traits, we did not want him labelled too soon when it may have been more of a social maturity problem. Our paediatrician agreed. He tends to think that our child may just be a bit 'quirky' and we are currently seeing how he fits in at school as he has just started prep. He is doing amazingly well for someone that cant handle a shopping centre usually! He is excited to go each morning. Anywho..I would definitely get a professional opinion but be sure to get a couple of opinions. How has he gone at school? Have you had feedback from any teachers that there may be something that needs attention? Be careful of the quick label of aspergers which I think may be diagnosed a little too easily these days. What if he is labelled and it turns out that it was a misdiagnosis? Will this affect his future plans if he needs medical clearance for applying for employment ie. airforce? Good luck with everything! I know just where you are coming from and its an everyday uphill battle and I pray everything turns out well for you, your son and the rest of your family x
I have a 14 year old Son with Aspergers. I would recommend going to see a Paeditrician. Don't try to self diagnose, go to your Dr & ask for a referral. Best wishes.
hi what do u do when ur paeditirician dose not lisen to u iam in dv right now but my girl has been like what they said there kid is seen birth I have 3 other kids I just want help for her and my family
hi what do u do when ur paeditirician dose not lisen to u iam in dv right now but my girl has been like what they said there kid is seen birth I have 3 other kids I just want help for her and my family