I decided against child support from my ex 2 years ago because I wanted to be free from him. It was just another way for him to still control me with his constant abusive phonecalls and threats. 2 years of freedom later, my circumstances are changing , I'll be moving to a more expensive town to access better schools and opportunities for our children, who are 12, 14 and 16. I'll be going from 70k a year job to 40k. I now need his help to raise our kids so I went CSA collect a few months ago...and its all started again. I'm stronger than I was before, but he knows exactly how to break me. He's done it so many times before. I don't want to be controlled by him anymore. The things that comes out of his mouth, not only about me but his own kids makes me absolutely disgusted and sick. I hate myself for letting him do it to me, I just want peace. He earns 110 k a year. He had to pay 1400 a month to begin , then he lied about care percentage so it went down to 900, which I was happy with anyway so I let it go. Now he wants me to go into a private agreement and pay 500 a month. I know as soon as he gets me into a private agreement he will not pay. What are my options ?
3 Replies
You need to leave it in the hands of child support!! They can collect it on your behalf and they will even let his employer know and they will take it out of his pay and then child support make sure it gets to you! He can not decide what he pays you, that is what child support do!! He has gotten away with it for long enough and now has to help support his children.
You don't need to speak with him about it leave that to CSA they can deal with it. What he is saying about you and your children is disgusting and he is clearly only speaking that way because believe it or not this is in YOUR CONTROL not his and he doesn't like it!! Stay in control sweet heart this is under your terms not his and him lashing out is proof that he has no control.
All the best mumma you are a super star!!
If he's abusing you over contacting CSA then contact the police and get no contact orders put in place.
Give him a chance to pay privatly. Personally I think $1400 a month is ridiculous! Its your choice to send them to private schools. Together my husband and I earn roughly 110k a year also which might sound like alot but if we had to pay someone $1400 a month we would be flat broke