Hi IM's ?
My husband and I separated (his idea) in Feburary and he just recently decided he wants to give it another shot. In those 3 months we opened our own bank accounts but we still have a joint account for our home loan. He wants to keep our accounts separate cause he thinks it's a good idea to have our own money, he earns twice as much as me. My question is do many married couples have separate accounts, who pays for what?? I know we should sit down as talk about it but we have always had the one account.
7 Replies
Get some legal advice. Legally there might be no difference at the end of the day if you go your separate ways again but I'd want to know. Also do you work it out on a percentage or what? The problem I see is it is a terrible idea to move in with someone who wouldn't be prepared to support you financially if you got sick or lost your job. Because centrelink wont step in and support you if your husband wont and vice versa. So I take the rule if you wouldn't be prepared to financially support me in that situation then we are not ready to live together.
My husband and I have always had seperate accounts and it works wonderfully. The way we set it up was to sit down and work ou exactly who earns what and what we need to pay then calculated if we pay all our needs what's left and agreed on our 'play money" which to us is $150 each a week for whatever we want. We then deducted that amount from each of our earnings and shared the bills between what was left. So yeah he earns more and pays more bills but at the end of the day we're even because I work part time to be at home with our kids so I lose income there. I would never share accounts. As long as it's fairly worked to accommodate your situation then I think it's a great idea.
I know it's not what your used to but change can be good and things weren't working before unfortunately so maybe this is worth a try on new grounds just make sure it's fair so you have some independence too
Yes my partner and I have seperate accounts and I would probably never change to a joint one. I love having my own accounts and my own money. he earns a little more than me so he does pay extra on some bills but the rest is usually 50/50. I get this wouldn't work for some people but it does for us at least try and see if it works but if your really against it have a talk with hubby and say it's not going to work for you
I have recently separated from my husband of 15 years, together 20. We have always had separate bank accounts because I learnt very early on that I would have to justify every single cent I spent and I refuse to live like that. I received his bank details just recently because we are going through settlement. He had an account that he's been telling me and everyone else including the marriage counsellor that it was to take our family on an overseas trip. It turns out it was his pub account and there was $200 left after saving for years. His visa is used as his online pokie gambling account. Maybe I would have known the extent of his gambling addiction sooner had we had a joint account but he would have had complete control of the accounts to hide it. My husband has always earned more than me he had the full time job, but he always said he never had extra money if I needed help for something. Now I know why.
I would be wondering why he wants to have his own money hidden from you, especially after he has just left you. Sorry but sounds suss to me. If you do really trust him and want separate accounts then have both salaries go into a joint account and then have each persons spending money transfer into the personal accounts so that most of it is still joint family money
Ask to see his new account as proof you can trust him. Then YOU decide what YOU want. He sounds like a bully who just left you and the affair went tits up. You shouldn't let him make all the decisions in the relationship. Get some support and speak up. Good luck.
My husband and I have seperate accounts and it works for us. He earns twice as much as me too but we just split everything.