My partner doesn't understand vaginal health. Been together for over a decade and he's just found out I don't use soap/body wash to clean doen there, and he is utterly grossed out.
He was like "so how do you wash it" I was honest and said warm/hot water and a loofa. The look on his face was one of disgust. I tried to explain to him about PH levels, good and bad bacteria, and how using products can cause issues. He just thinks I'm grose now. He won't even listen to me now about it and demands I "clean myself properly"
How do I make him understand. I don't think he's ever had thrush or a UTI in his life. I've asked him to read up and he won't.
8 Replies
People hear "vagina" and think that refers to the entire pubic area. It actually annoys me how little clue men have about female anatomy, plenty of women are totally uninformed about their own bodies as well!
So he's probably heard this revelation as if you don't wash downstairs at all and he's being a giant ASS by demanding you wash properly when he won't even take the time to learn about feminine hygiene needs.
I mean, you can (and in some cases probably should) wash your outer groin area with a delicate body wash or soap though.
I get really sweaty at work so I'd absolutely reek if I didn't use soap at all in that region.
I wash mine with sorbolene cream In the shower . I wash inside and outside this way too and rinse thoroughly. Never had an issue.
Side note, you can also safely use diluted Sorbonne cream as a lube for sex too, including with condoms.
As for just using nothing but water, yeh, I couldn't. I would still feel like I haven't cleaned myself at all and om sure i would still smell a bit.
*sorbolene
I use shower gel on everything except the inner vagina. Just don't tell him anything he doesn't need to know what you do down there.
You can buy non-soap, soap, I was introduced to it when my son had an op and wound.
I wouldn't feel comfortable just using water tbh.
Buy some cetaphil from the supermarket or chemist. It's a soap alternative and was recommended by a doctor when I was a teenager. It won't mess with your PH, or irritate, it's fragrance free.
Also just wanted to say that what you've been doing has obviously been working as it doesn't sound like he has had any complaints!
When a woman washes her body with soap or body wash, it would run over the pubic area, and using a loofah over that area would be normal. Using soap on between the inner and outer labia would likely cause the pH to get out of whack. I just use a loofah on the pubic area, then use warm water on the labia. There is no need to wash the actual vagina. People need to learn female anatomy. Your husband needs to do some reading and learn to respect you as a woman. You know your body better than anyone else.
I’m sorry but it sounds symptomatic of a lot more. It doesn’t sound like one very strange reaction… it sounds like he might be a bit of a douche (pun intended) in general…