I have a 6yo who is autistic and adhd, I’m pretty sure I am autistic too but am yet to be formally diagnosed. I try to keep on top of my housework as it is an area if I let slip causes me so much mental effort and anxiety to get on top of. The problem is my child, she can literally look at something and creates as mess. She will help herself to food and just drop the rubbish wherever she is standing. When she eats she makes so much mess, and on top of everyday household chores I’m so exhausted. Not to mention I can have any form of liquid soap or anything as she uses it inappropriately and it creates more mess. She gets into my make up no matter how many times I move it, and today she got nail polish all over my kitchen sink, I literally cannot do anything unless she is with me otherwise she just ends up somewhere else creating more mess. I do get her to clean up her messes but even that is a chore as her executive functioning skills are non existent. I’m honestly so done with everything and almost daily I think it would be so much easier if I didn’t wake up tomorrow, but even then I know my daughter would have no one if that were to happen. I’m not sure what I’m after by posting this but just needed to get it off my chest.
1 Replies
I have had three young children and please do not take this the wrong way but some of this is normal age appropriate behaviour. They drove me bonkers lol.
First question is whether or not you can access any respite care through NDIS as this may give you a little break now and then.
Secondly, the best advice I received was to take them to the park in the morning or do activities and not to even bother trying to clean until after they have run off a bit of energy. This was a complete game changer for me.
I had to lock up anything I did not want them touching. Saved me so much of a headache. But still let her have a go at make-up as a bonding exercise and with you. Look for alternatives e.g. playdoh, the colouring books which you can paint with water, kinetic sand etc. Things that you allow her to do. I had a rule, no fingernail polish inside but there are some water washable ones out there.
Some of this may have to do with acceptance and your own coping with mess. I had to have a massive shift in my expectations once I had children and I still struggle at times.
Hope something in this helps. Definitely speak to her specialists e.g. OT about activities as well