I have a lot going on in my life. I won't go into these things, but I'm exhausted. My entire life revolves around these things with no escape and I feel suffocated. Just when one thing works itself out, another thing happens. I feel like the writers of "the days of our lives" is scripting my entire existence.
When I think about it.... it's like drama follows me everywhere. Is it me? Far back as I can remember, DRAMA..... I keep most of it to myself. I avoid friends and family because I have nothing else to talk about because I'll that's happened recently is more drama. I'm isolating myself, as I don't want people thinking I'm thriving on it or attention seeking. It's at that point now, that things seem so far fetched, that so much can happen to one person, I'm scared people will think I'm some nut job making crap up to look important, too keep all eyes on me.
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10 Replies
Your boundaries may be off and you may not listen to your instincts, so you may attract toxic people in your life.
If you listen to your gut and cut these people off, you would have no drama.
To have drama, two people must engage, disengage and cut off immediately.
That is how you eliminate drama in your life.
What if the drama isnt because of toxic people or people at all? . Things like housing crisis, unemployment, kids behaviour at school, dying family members, custody, my health, replacing items due to theft, or breaking down, and the list goes on of continued issues. It's not always person related. It's a case of, if it could happen to any one, it has to happen to me or my family
Oh okay, I misunderstood.
I think protecting yourself as much as possible is the only want to minimise this kind of stuff.
Like having car insurance, contents insurance, saving for a rainy day etc.
But life throws stuff at us that we aren't prepared for, it sux, I feel you.
Hope things turn around for you x
Also, lowering expectations. Many of us don't want to live with others or family but sometimes we just gotta suck it up and live with it until we can step up to the next rung. Applying for lower rate or casual jobs, fast food places, supermarkets, uber, merchandising, cleaner, there's so many! I live in a small rural town and jobs are in abundance, I find it hard to believe people can't get jobs these days and it usually comes down to being picky. Really assess what you are capable of regarding illness/disability, better to give something a try instead of not trying at all, you'll surprise yourself! There's also fee free tafe, most courses include prac where you will usually gain payed employment out of it. Perception is everything
All the best x
I'm applying left right and centre, but due to my limitations, I'm being passed on jobs I'm totally qualified for and capable of due to being a risk. I'm told constantly why I'm being passed up... I suffer auto immune and it comes and goes so I could be bed ridden for weeks and fine for weeks, it's unpredictable so they won't risk it. I quit my job of 10yrs because I was unwell 5 out of 7 days a week. I don't qualify to a pension.
Different commenter...Surely if you know you're fine to work atm and have been for a while, why tell them that you have an illness?
I'm bipolar and could become manic and end up in hospital and unable to leave the house for months, touch wood I haven't for a long time, but I don't tell them that.
Deal with what is in front of you, you're fine, so don't self sabotage yourself.
If you desperately wanted a job, you wouldn't disclose that.
Nothing changes when nothing changes.
You're not legally required to disclose disabilities to prospective or current employers!! There are very few jobs where you are legally required to disclose (pilots for example). While they say it won't affect your application, we know it absolutely does.
I feel like sometimes people prefer to be a victim than actually step out of their comfort zone and change things.
Maybe your family are tired of giving you suggestions on how to improve your circumstances and you shoot them down with excuses like you just gave us.
I find that people who have the attitude that they are a passenger in their own life, this happened and that happened, never have the guts to turn the bus around and take control.
Yes, things happen that we can't control but there are many things we can do to take back some that control.
There are people who have had the most tragic lives, things happened in their childhood etc. but they don't let that define them and they get out there and give it a go and make their lives a success.
Also with autoimmune diseases, there are things you can do to minimise flare ups, getting plenty of sleep, eating well, exercising etc.
I had to quit my job because of my daughter became wheelchair bound, but I was able to get a work from home job, due to all the hard work and study I have done over the last 5 years.
I don’t think people prefer to be a victim. They probably don’t realise that’s how it comes across. It’s bloody hard with medical issues. Life is hard. some aren’t equipped with the coping skills, to change that mindset. Some have been raised this way and probably think it’s nothing. They don’t know any different. When your down and out, sometimes it’s hard to get out of it. Everything goes wrong.
Before you try to tackle anything I want you to make a Dr appt and get a mental health plan. Sometimes it's hard to see the forest for the trees and just having someone impartial to have a listen, identify opportunities and give you the skills to work your way through the shitshow is going to be so valuable for you.