Has anyone else had a hard time turning 40?
I’m less patient with things and feel I’m too old for certain things. I have a little bit of grief over wishing I was in a different place at 40 than I am now. I’m reflecting a lot about my past and nervous about getting old. I feel like life has passed me by too quickly. I feel like I should be more mature now I’m 40. Stress seems to get to me more and I don’t bounce back physically with things like I used to. I feel a little hormonal but my periods are still normal and regular. I’m feeling quite alone, so I appreciate anyone’s experience with this.
(Serotonin levels are high, bloodwork perfect, and I don’t feel depressed.)
4 Replies
Put some things in to perspective here. There are people your age fighting for their lives or going though illnesses and wishing they had your life. Nothing matters but your health. If you have your health then you have everything that you need.
It doesn’t matter if you have a house, a car or what ever you think you should have at 40. None of it matters, can’t change anything. Just enjoy life & do what ever makes you happy.
Getting older obviously things change and we don’t bounce back like we used to. I go for regular walks and find this helps.
Try something new and Change things and shift your focus. Age is just a number. Don’t focus on that number. I don’t think about my age after 40, forget how old I am often.
If you feel Life has passed you by too quickly, get out and start doing new things. Write a list of what you want to do and go do them. Before you know it, you’ll be 50 and wishing you did all those things. Don’t put it off.
This is all really reflective! You have great insight, and you asked the question and then went ahead and answered it yourself!
when I read on, I could understand exactly youre having these feelings/ struggles. I don’t have them, so I can reassure you that when you get on top of them then you’ll also embrace being older and wiser.
And that’s not to say I have everything in order, but I do have enough in order that I feel ok about it all and I agree, at 40 we start to see the bigger picture - there’s finite years until retirement now.
But it doesn’t take long to turn it around, something I do is set goals, so that when I turned 30 I had completed a degree and traveled. When I turned 40 I felt accomplished that I had done some other things from my list/ or worked on them/ formed the goal/ or even got the ball rolling. And I’m working on some others so that when I hit 50 I’ll be able to feel good about it.
I'm 45. I think the less patient is a common thing. I know myself and my friends have a greatly reduced patience for bull shit for sure! We're 'that woman' that doesn't suffer incompetence, bad service, fakery etc. Not rude about it but definitely assertive.
Nervous about getting older? Most of us are for many reasons. Consider yours.
What can you change?
What can't you (be honest here, no too hard basket shit, only what is actually unattainable).
Do you have an idea of where you want to be or is it just an undefined dissatisfaction?
Life going fast, hell yes!!
I don't know anyone the same age as us that doesn't agree.
Maturity looks different to everyone.
Stress, OMG I don't know if it's that as we get older we usually attract more responsibilities, or if it's a simple as a sign of the time that life in general is more stressful than ever but I feel ya. Manage it as best you can and if it gets the best of you speak to your doctor.
That not bouncing back, we all have war stories.
I used to be able to drink all night, go to bed at 4am, get up at 6am and adult. I had a few last night, was in bed before 12am and slept until after 9!
Skating has been back in fashion for years but I'm not bendy any more, there will be no skating for this little duck. FiL and a work colleague are full of pins after thinking skating at 40-50 was a good idea.
If I sit in one place too long it takes a minute to straighten up. Sometimes my knee locks up on me. It's a fact of life. We can't get a car with a warranty over 10 years but we think our bodies are going to be prime for 40, 60, 100 years.
One thing that is super common is that feeling of being alone. Society in general is doing that to us. Push yourself to create and maintain connections.
I hit my 40's pretty easily.
25 year quarter life crisis was the kicker.
40 was fine for me but turning 50 was really hard. Two of my kids were hitting adulthood and that really made me question everything and almost feel redundant. I still feel like I wasted so much time worrying about silly things. My Aunty said something the other day, which made me think, 'Remember you will never be this young again, so embrace it'.,