I miss my SIL. Ever since she fell pregnant last year and had bub now, she has shut me out. We used to be so close. She won’t let any family be involved even to just support her. She won’t even let the dad do much with the baby. Everything has to be perfect and her way. What has happened?
4 Replies
What about just a playdate? Without any expectation of offering to help? A coffee at a local cafe could be the start?
She could be differing post natal depression. Turn up there with morning tee and tell her that you miss her and ask her if she needs anything or just msg her and ask.
Suffering
It could be pnd, but also, I find it really sucks to have everyone saying you must have a mental illness when actually what has happened is that she’s had a baby. It’s a massive transition. It’s hugely stressful, and bloody exhausting. You need your people around you. Not people telling you you’re doing it wrong or it must be done some other way.
If you offer help, and you really want to help, then that is how help needs to be given - her way. And if you can’t do that, support her in saying positive things to her and about her. Don’t add to her stress and she’ll most likely make room to let you in.