What do I do? A person who was close to me for years but manipulated me against others, gossiped about everyone, made up things to others to get them in their side, said the most horrible things about me to friends but nice to my face etc…so I just stepped back and didn’t engage anymore. It’s been a few years since contact. But she has cancer now. Do I contact her? I feel like a terrible person if I don’t. But she has also caused me so much grief over time I feel torn and don’t want to be engaging with her anymore.
6 Replies
I think keep walking on your past.
Guilt isn’t a reason to reach out. And on that you have nothing to feel guilty for.
Some people are only in our lives for a season.
She is unwell and you can have empathy for that without re engaging.
No. The reason we are not in contact with people is because contact didn’t work for us. I think, since she has cancer, it’s especially important for her to have her good friends close by.
If you wish her well, send her well wishes, but I wouldn’t be trying anything more right now and I’d guess she wouldn’t want to either.
No. I have been through the same and if she got cancer I wouldn't be contacting her.
You're not obligated to make contact with someone because you've heard they're sick.
Move on, this isn't someone who you want in your life and I doubt Cancer has changed her behavioural patterns.
No, don’t contact her. I think your intentions are good but it’s best left in the past. You can make a small donation to a cancer fund for her if that makes you feel at better and know that you have done something to aknowlrge her pain and help others also, but no, you need to move on.
Karma has taken control. Don't let yourself get sucked in again.