So my partner and I haven't been on the greatest terms with his dishonesty over a few yrs. I've tried and tried to make it work. I'm currently first trimester and I have been struggling emotionally and physically in this pregnancy where I want nothing at all to do with him or anyone really. I no he has needs and one's I can't give him. I just don't feel it.
Anyway we joked over the last few days about him going to a brothel to fix him up. Told him I wouldn't care at least he would leave me alone. He kept saying no way he wouldn't do that to me and it was way to uncomfortable etc and no way.
So he goes for a massage with happy endings. He came home and told me. I feel sick to my stomach. And pretty upset with myself. Im not angry at him.I thought I wouldn't care. But he went and did it when he said no way.
I would never condone this in any relationship I've ever been in. So I really don't know what to do anymore. I've lost myself. My values and morals of a relationship. But I also feel a little betrayed he said no but then did it anyway.
Please no hateful or spiteful comments. I guess I'm Just asking for thoughts and if anyone has done this before in there relationship
3 Replies
I’d say he’s already been there and he is saying No way, to throw you off. He wouldn’t just go in for a happy ended if he felt that strongly about it. He’s lying and you need to leave and find your happiness. He can still be in your life with the baby but from a distance. Happy ended and brothel no different. Go and stay with some family or friends and get away from him.
Dishonesty = run!
Cheating is cheating and that’s cheating, paid, free, happy ending it’s all cheating. But you also told him to so then he’d leave you alone.
If you really didn’t want him to then don’t give half responses but be open and clear and to the point. Don’t tell him to go , but hoping he’d tell you he won’t he can’t he wouldn’t etc.
it backfired and now it’s something you have to make the decision can you move on and forget or if you can’t then end it. No point dragging it out and punishing yourselves if you can’t get past it.