Years after my husband died I met a man who I fell deeply in love with. After almost two years he broke up with me via a text after promising me and my son the world. Looking back I feel his mother was never going to accept me because of differences in cultural backgrounds. It left me and my son devastated and the truth be known I still don’t think I’m over it. It’s been two years since this and I’ve now met a man who is wonderful to me and my son. We are friends but he is now wanting to have a relationship. However I do not find him physically attractive. He is thoughtful, kind and we laugh a lot. I honestly think this is my issue not his. I feel that I put barriers up to ensure that I don’t get hurt again. I don’t want to hurt this new man because he is a nice guy. I don’t want to be with anyone else either I’m just reluctant to expose my son to another failed relationship as well. I just don’t think I can trust anyone again. I’m so confused right now and would appreciate any advice from anyone that has been in a similar situation.
2 Replies
You aren't physically attracted = friendship.
Even with all your other issues, you would absolutely know if there was chemistry and you were attracted to him.
That's something you can't ignore.
He's a nice guy, but not your nice guy, leave him for another woman who totally has the hots for him and can't keep her hands off him.
He deserves that.
You just see him as a friend and that is ok!
Just because he treats you well, it doesn’t mean you owe him a relationship further than friendship.
He may need to distance himself to protect his feelings a bit and that’s ok to.
It’s not ok to say you want a relationship in order to keep the friendship, when your heart isn’t in it.
It’s not fair to him, you or your son and will end in a toxic relationship dynamic.