How do you get your teens to actually do anything to help out around the house when they have zero motivation? (ADHD)
What things do your teens do to help out and how do you go about getting them to do it?
How do you get your teens to actually do anything to help out around the house when they have zero motivation? (ADHD)
What things do your teens do to help out and how do you go about getting them to do it?
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4 Replies
Mine stack the dishwasher 3 - 4 nights a week, take bins out each day( they take in turns) hang washing out at least once a week. I also get them to put their clothes in the washing machine each day and once a week I get them each to put the washing machine on and do it all themselves. I also get them to put their own clothes in draws after I’ve folded them all. If they don’t do any of these things, they don’t watch tv or go on lap tops. To the point that I take the wifi out the wall. They also don’t get any take away or treats they may ask for. They don’t have phone so if they did then I’d hold their phones until they did their jobs. I don’t ask a lot. It’s just small things that don’t take them long but teaches them to do things and not treat me like a slave and expect it. They also help me with cooking if I ask or my daughter 13 will cook because she likes to. My son has no motivation but if there’s something he wants and I take it, he gets it done in a flash.
As an ADHDer parenting an ADHDer, finding ways to "hack" the task to get dopamine is one thing that helps. What does that will be different for everyone. I find time "constraints" help me, by setting a timer and getting stuff done it feels competitive. They may need help remembering or a visual reminder of what to do, since telling them "Unpack the dishwasher, bring in the washing and take the bins out" might start them on the first task but they might forget tasks 2 & 3.
There's stacks of helpful resources online that might help. Googling ADHD chore hacks brings up heaps of helpful tips.
Set a timer, put some music on and call it hour of power. Works for me as an adult with adhd.
Tell them this is what’s expected of them. When they object tell them they are part of the family and if they want to continue enjoying the benefits that come with Being part of the family they will help out