I am struggling with getting over the fact my fiancé left me for another women (not his first affair mind you). We were together for so many years like 15 and we were finally going to get married when I discovered his affair and he has moved in with his co worker…. And discarded me like I never existed… I am getting counseling but I just want his relationship to fall apart for all the pain it’s caused me. I am hoping most of these relationships actually do fall apart as they built on dishonesty…
Tips for moving on and not feeling like rubbish
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17 Replies
Wishing his relationship to fall apart is partly whats keeping you in this dark place.
I know it feels satisfying and makes you feel kind of vindicated to think about him experiencing the pain you have but realistically, it has no effect on him whatsoever but it prevents you from moving on in a healthy way.
You deserve to be free of all this! You deserve to be out there living your best life.
He and his colleague got exactly what they deserve in each other and they have to live with their deceitful behaviour.
You get to live with a clear conscience ❤️
Oh sweetheart, in all honesty it probably will fall apart anyway (she will either get bored of him and cheat or he will do what he does best and cheat on her) but I wouldn’t stress to much about him and his relationship. You should be grateful the trash took itself out. Hopefully you don’t have children with him so you can cut contact and heal. And If you do have children together, I’m truely sorry that you will have to deal with him and that your children have such a pathetic/selfish excuse for a father. But you’ve got this, you deserve so much more than you realise. I imagine after finding out about his first affair and what it took to forgive/accept it and move forward would have been hard enough but to find he has no respect for you and your relationship and had no problem continuing to betray you must just feel like he carved your heart out of your chest and shattered it… 😔 I really do hope you don’t have children with this man.
Also it really says something about the fact that he only left you because you discovered it 😅
Babe you deserve so much better and some bloke will come along one day and treat you and your children the way they deserve 💕
We have 2 children together,older but he doesn’t even talk to them either he has totally discarded his life for her. They too are traumatised and seeking professional help because of his behaviour 😢
What an inconsiderate selfish pig!
Eew imagine the potential stds he could have been bringing home to you! He sounds like such a catch 🙄 you deserve so much better hun!
Yep as soon as I found out I went and got tested.thankfully I am all clear :-)
Yep as soon as I found out I went and got tested.thankfully I am all clear :-)
He clearly has a character default and very clearly a lack of morals. His relationship will fall apart once he’s bored of everyday life with her and he will go searching again for something to fill the void. He will probably never mature enough to realise the sacrifice and commitment it goes into a real adult relationship so I wouldn’t stress too much about that. If you can, cut all contact with him and focus on you. Have a pick me up day, a spa or nails or something to lift your confidence a little and to help relieve stress. Him cheating says so much about him and how he deals with situations and the fact you’ve previously forgiven him for cheating/an affair shows how much you clearly loved him and were willing to sacrifice you own mental health /confidence to be with him but he’s showed you over and over again that you meant nothing to him. I really feel for you and I hope you find happiness 💕
I’m so sorry you have to go through this, the amount of deceit it takes to have an affair is disgusting, he’s clearly always had this character flaw. 😬 whenever I hear these stories I hope the cheater goes on to be cheated on for years behind his back and made to look like the fool he is for cheating and have his heart crushed … but I’m a tad spiteful 🫣🤭
Change your internal dialogue.
Every time you are negative it digs you deeper in that hole.
Pardon the language, but he's gone because he's a shit cunt with no fucking morals or integrity. Whether his current relationship lasts or not - doesn't change what is wrong with him.
Stop giving this trash real estate in your head.
I can give you the best tip right that he will hate. Pick yourself, get yourself out there and enjoy your life. Live your life for you, like you have never lived it before and don’t waste anytime in this precious life, being sad over a loser like that. In a few years down the track, you will look back and say, what a blessing in disguise. He did you a favour, you are just yet to see it. I wasted 6 months of being sick and depressed after this happened to me then when I got out and met my now husand, I really regretted not getting out sooner and wasting so much time being so down over him, he wasn’t worth it. As much as it hurt me, I can look back now and say thank god he did; else I wouldn’t have the life, kids and husband that I have today. Your ex will do this again, with this girl and the next. They don’t change. He will be bored with her next. Please try your best to do new things and make yourself feel good and get out and enjoy life. It’s honestly not worth wasting time being down over cheating scumbags. They will get their karma.
Haha... ending up with him IS her punishment from the sounds of it. Let it go and find someone worth your time and energy
It won’t last long though 🤭
You are worth so much more. Don’t feel like rubbish. He is the rubbish that’s taken himself out to the trash. Sit back and be glad that this scum is no longer in your life. He’s done it before, he will do it again to her. It will fall apart for him. He isn’t genuine, you are. You have another amazing life out there waiting for you.
So sorry this is happening to you. Karma will find him eventually. Dream sweetly at night knowing this . Big hugs.
This happened to me. They did split & yes I was happy. But then found another.
Honestly, even though he's an absolute, complete arsehole.. the only way to move forward is FORGIVENESS & wishing him the best. I know it sounds wrong & that he doesn't deserve it, but do it for YOU. You'll be surprised ❤ Good luck on a new part of your life & think of it as him doing you a favour, you were too good for him from the very start x