Am i overreacting? My partner of almost 13years was getting msgs from a chick asking y she hasnt seen him at our local pub lately. when i asked y is she asking he said she was just wanting him to do a job for her but that doesnt explain her question right. when i memtioned that and asked if i could see the msg he said he already deleted the msg cos he doesnt want to do the job, ok so if that was the case y not tell her he doesnt and y delete the msg, he never that i know of deletes other msgs about jobs. Our trust has been on shaky grou d as he has lied to me previously but he is working on it
11 Replies
Think it's time to get a babysitter, go to the pub with him and suss the reactions for yourself. If he's reluctant to take you then you don't even need to suss out the reactions, his should be enough to tell you that he's up to no good.
Iphones (if he is using one) now have a recently deleted section in messages.
If it was through Facebook messenger then the messages are gone.
If it was Android, i’m not sure if they have a recently deleted section
Hope this helps in some way
Iphones (if he is using one) now have a recently deleted section in messages.
If it was through Facebook messenger then the messages are gone.
If it was Android, i’m not sure if they have a recently deleted section
Hope this helps in some way
If he's avoiding her, it may be because she's keen, but he's not. Maybe it's his way of letting her down gently. Like, not many man would avoid their watering hole with out a good reason.
Or, they did something he's ashamed of, so now he's avoiding it in the hopes it will simply go away.
Always trust your gut
I'm married to a tradie. He gets messages like this. They're exactly what your partner is saying and my hubby deletes messages from people trying to organise cashies too. He's not interested. And no, I'm not an idiot. The amount of time people message me because he hasn't replied isn't funny.
He's lied because he doesn't want the drama from you . Rightly or wrongly, that is why.
Is there any chance that he met her at the pub randomly, and she knew he was a tradie and asked for his number to do a job but now she is using that number to try and hook up with him and he isn’t interested?
Men don’t see things the same as us.
If i had a guy messaging me inappropriately, i would go straight to my partner and ask him to help me get rid of the pest.
Men would rather just delete the messages and hope it goes away. They are far more relaxed than we are
I would definitely be sus about him deleting the messages, if he doesn't usually delete things.
The question about "why haven't I seen you" - that needs more context. Maybe they are friendly & she is genuinely checking in that he's ok & it's nothing creepy. Although if my partner got one like that, he would respond with something like "all good, just been hanging at home with my girl", just to make things clear.
Although, if he has lied to you in the past, especially about women, I'd be very sus about it.
Always trust your gut 🤷♀️
I feel like someone asking your husband where he's been ( if he is a regular at the pub) isn't a big deal, it's pretty common. Perhaps he deleted the messages and lied because you assume the worst of him, based on a message which is not sexual in nature.
If he was seeing her or having an affair why is she asking why she hasn’t seen him? If she’s spoke to or hooked up recently wouldnt she ask that in person?
One good thing is least she didn’t say was good to see you last night