I feel like since we had a baby a year ago my fiance picks at everything I do or don't do. For example if I forget to turn the exhaust fan on when we are both in the shower he picks at me for that, when he could just do it himself. Just little things that add up. I'm tired, I work, go to uni and have a 1 year old. I feel like they are things not even worth mentioning to me really. I wouldn't start an argument over those small things. He also tells me he is in pristine condition, I am not. What would you do? What do I say to get through to him that he is hurting my feelings? He isn't trying to be malicious, he just finds himself funny but I don't.
7 Replies
Remind him who is carrying the household, his one year old BABY and even has to turn on the exhaust fan when he has a shower!!! Doesn’t sound too pristine to me 🙄
Omg what a friggen pig! He is smashing you and your confidence piece by piece bit by bit. Where the respect for the mother of his child. You might not think it’s malicious but he knows what he is doing and it’s shredding your confidence.
If my husband told me a year after a baby that he is pristine and I wasn’t, I’d kick his ass out and let him go find someone else who he thinks is pristine. What a think to even say. Who thinks of that. He needs to grow there fk up.
Stand up to him, don’t take any shit and tell him to turn the fkn fan on himself. Guys like they really piss me off. Look at you, bring mum, working, uni.. he couldn’t do all that, I bet. You are super mum and it’s about time you put yourself up on a pedestal for what you do and not let him knock you down off it. If anything I think he feels threatened so he has to chip at away at you, to make himself feel better.
Pristine my ass, he is a disrespectful grub!
And apologies for some of the wording auto spell! I have 3 kids and I know how hard it is and how hard we already are on ourselves. Do not allow him to do this to you. Get strong and use your voice. Don’t put up with it, because it will get worse. It’s not funny, he is hiding behind his humour to get away with it.
He is absolutely being a douchebag. He may gloss over it as a joke, but he absolutely means it. He is eroding your confidence bit by bit, and he knows it.
Don't fool yourself honey, he knows he's being hurtful and is doing it on purpose.
He's not trying to be malicious, he just thinks he's funny?
That's almost worse. That it's simply his sense of humour to make disparaging comments about your physique and pick fights with you about insignificant things.
I also don't believe that for a second - there's a motivation here and you know what I think it is? I think he has an over inflated sense of his own importance and his ego can't take the fact that you're smashing life so he throws all these little digs in to knock you down a peg.
I wouldn't be standing for that at all, he'd either be pulling his head in or I'd be leaving his pristine ass.
Have a chat to him and let him know you don't find his comments funny and he's hurting your feelings. Sounds like he has quite an inflated ego if he's saying he's in pristine condition. If he doesn't stop with the comments once you've had a chat I'd suggest seeing a counsellor to help him understand what he's doing and how it's affecting you.
Those comments are a form of relationship abuse. This is how it starts, he’s chipping away at your self confidence bit by bit. Tell him straight out that he’s not funny, he’s being an arsehole and if he thinks he’s so pristine he can fk off and go find someone who meets his standards.
I’m sorry to be so blunt but I’m old and have no tolerance for bullshit now days.
Kick the wanker to the kerb. You can do better.