Am I in the wrong?
My mother inlaw let us live with her paying half of most expenses then all of the water bill while our house was built. There was another person also paying 1/4 of all bills. Now thats it's built she is living in her caravan on our property.
We have asked for 80 bucks per week this breaks down to 60 rent 10 electricity 5 for water which also pays for our septic service 5 for internet as we have to pay higher fees due to location plus we have to purchase modem and booster so she has adequate service. I believe we don't need the net and have only put it on for her benefit as I think the kids overuse it.
She doesn't budget well so thought this way she shouldn't have to pay any other expenses and will be able to not have any unexpected bills to stress about.
She is saying she is paying too much and that this is very expensive because she is living in her own caravan.
Am I wrong to think this is cheap rent, considering she has full access to the house,we keep lights on for her, and she occasionally will have dinner with us.
I understand times are tough but I also have alot of new expenses to pay on my own as I am sole income for my family. If my partner finds work and she has to assist with the kids we would charge less.
18 Replies
Out of interest I looked up how much it costs to park a camper or van at my local caravan park. It's $5 a night just to park there with no access to the amenities, so $30 per week just to use the land essentially. It's $25 a night if you want power and water - that's $175 a week.
I don't know if that's the norm across the board but I'm still feeling like $80 a week to park the van and have unlimited internet, power and water is pretty good but I also think it depends on her income, whether or not you need to be charging her for the use of your land and whether she's in her van out of necessity or if it's a choice.
I think you need to compare it to when you were living with her. If you as a family, were only paying half the bills then that's a very good deal she gave you. If it went by person and you were a family of say 4, then 5 people in the household so her share should have been one fifth, not half. She did you guys a huge favour allowing you to stay there while you built but now she's living there you all of a sudden think it's fair she pays her way and then some. I get paying for power if you're on a budget but come on, rent for her to park her van, really? Internet when we all know it costs you no extra for her to use it? I think you're being very unfair. This isn't some random you've let park up in the yard this is your family who recently helped you out greatly, the least you can do is return the favour.
I agree . She should only pay for her usage of power, gas and water . None of the other expenses will change . She's probably buying her own food too which is also fair .
If she is using your power & water then she should be paying her share but charging her to park her own van on your property is a little rich. Is she able to help out with babysitting (if you have kids) or cleaning/meal prep while you are at work in return for staying on your property?
You’re charging rent for your MIL to park her caravan on your property?
Wow and after she just let you stay in her home.
A bit toward electricity and water I would say, just your out of pocket expenses only.
Geez we cared for my elderly grandparents in our home, she is completely independent, you don’t know how good you have it.
See if she can live elsewhere in her own caravan for cheaper!! That’s a very low amount weekly and it covers everything sewage electric internet, she’s got a good deal.
I would make allowances though if her financial situation wasn’t good or if it’s a short term arrangement while she sorts herself out - that’s family favours. She can’t get on top while also out laying, money sucks and that’s where family and friends can really help each other - like she did for you.
What does your husband think about it? Work it out with him, what you want to charge her, then let him discuss it with his mother. Personally, I think $80 is a pretty good deal given it covers everything except food.
My friend and her 2 kids are moving in with us because her house is being sold as part of her settlement. We're not charging anything. She can't get a rental and isn't able to buy yet. And she's not family. If you need money, get her to contribute to her actual use. Charging for your yard is nuts.
I like the way you added the bit about internet, what a joke, a family only has internet for grandma.
How would you have written into imperfect mum?
$80’ isn’t much at all but maybe change her $50 a week to cover bills instead of to park there. She can also get rent assistance. She is better off going for rent assistance and getting more and giving you the $80 a week. It’s cheap to cover everything and if you don’t like paying for internet cut it off. It’s that simple really.
I think people here are being a little harsh honestly!
Where else in the world could you have all your living expenses covered (bar food and personal items) for $80 a week?
I paid more than that in board a week in my own family home as a broke ass student lol.
Even if she's only receiving centrelink payments as income, it's still not a lot of money and she could even apply for rent assistance.
If she's in her caravan binging netflix every night and having her phone connected to the wifi, why shouldn't she chip in a measly $5 towards the bill? My internet plan is $75 for the month, so $5 isn't really a lot.
If she were only using her own mobile data, then I would say that 5 bucks could be shaved off.
Same deal with the land. I wouldnt feel good about using my adult child's land for free knowing that they were paying the mortgage and all their other bills off one income.
This isn't a young "broke" uni student that needs to learn how to pay their way so they can live for the next 40 years. It's an older person, presumedly at the end of their working life. They've been there and done it and also helped the OP and her family out by having them live with her and only paying half of the bills. So she was out of pocket paying 50% of the bills so this family had it easier while waiting for their house to be built. She did not gain money from them staying there, she would have lost money. She did them a favour when she didn't have to. If the OP is struggling then it's fair MIL pays her way but the $60 extra, why? That's not an expense. That's rent for dirt. It's really rude to charge an older person this after she just helped them out.
Cheapest camp I've found was $35 a week water, power, hot showers, flushing toilets. The week I was there they were discussing putting it up to $10/night with all the caravaners using air-con, appliances, tv running all day etc.
I agree with finding out the threshold for rent assistance and charging that so she gets a little bit of it back.
You don't need the internet and only put it on for her?, lol OK.
As if a family in 2022 "dont need the net"...😂
Anyway...charge what you want. But i think adding the internet and her dinner every now and then are a shit thing to consider in the equation... who charges their parents to come and have tea with them? Literally no One.
Take in to consideration the amount you payed when the shoe was on the other foot, personally I agree that she should be paying something but it comes down to individual situations.
what happened to her home? why is she not there? I don't think that is too much, my view is she could live elsewhere. Get a lease/ contract in place. what did it cost to live in her home? is it long term or for a short term?
Ask her what she thinks is appropriate.
$50- $80 per week seems fair.
The argument about the internet is ridiculous.
Make sure you write down for her everything that is included in her weekly payment
Site, Internet access, electricity, water, netflix? etc So that she can see the value you are paying and the percentage that she is contributing.