My son is 15 and has had anxiety all of his life. He is worse in any social settings or speaking to people. He is getting better at school slowly but keeps to himself.
He is at the age, where we are looking into some work for him in the future as a teen. In the long run, it will help him but he needs something to ease into and build upto it. He wants a job but then there is this massive fear.
Can any one suggest any jobs for a teen starting out working, who has severe anxiety that he can slowly work into and be in the background. Def no customer service jobs or large group settings.
He sees a professional to help him with this but it’s a long road and continuous that won’t go away but will be easier to manage over time.
Any suggestions would be fantastic. Thanks
5 Replies
I've just supported my son in not being ready. Sure it's hard but pushing was harder.
He's now in his early 20's.
The reason I wasn't terribly worried about pushing?
I was him. I didn't work until my early 20's. No lack of work ethic, not stupid or lazy or unwilling. The fear was crippling.
He has an appointment with the company I work for next week. I've finally convinced him that to make mistakes is human and not much you can do is actually unfixable. I've explained over the years about my numerous stuff ups, and how I can laugh about them now but at the time they were serious problems.
The work I do is in a factory. IMO, it's perfect. I didn't have to talk to anyone for a whole year. Learned my job and did it. That was all that was expected of me. As I came out of my shell people got to know the real me (bet they wished afterwards I'd stayed in my shell). Just took making those mistakes and realising all there is to do is take responsibility and be part of the solution.
Give your young fella an extra hug. I know his feels. And yours.
I too have crippling anxiety. I didn’t get my first job until i was 20 due to this, however, once i was working (registers at a supermarket) i very quickly became amazing at it, after 3 months my boss made me manager of customer service. I’d never worked before, it was a huge confidence booster.
Letting children become comfortable without forcing, but just gentle encouragement is fabulous!
I hope your son finds comfort and confidence working at your work 💜
Thank you.
Starting later hasn't hurt my career in the long term either. Within 8 years I was managing the facility and still am now.
I have always suffered anxiety and panic attacks but I didn't have a supportive upbringing. I was forced to fight it and go out of my comfort zone. My first job was at 16 at a supermarket because I had left home. I was very shy and didn't talk much but I still did it. I'm now 40 and have always pushed my way through anxiety to do things out of my comfort zone and I actually do enjoy customer service jobs, I have tried other jobs where I work by myself or with the same people every day but I find my mental health suffers and I get depressed. I don't have any friends so the interaction I get from customer service helps me feel less lonely and builds my confidence. I know today it's a very different approach to anxiety, kids are learning that if they feel anxious then they shouldn't do it but I think that is the wrong approach. Get them to pull the situation apart and see if their anxiety is warranted, what are they doing? Swimming with sharks? Anxiety warranted and they don't have to do it. Going to the Doctors? Not warranted, do it. Anxiety can't be treated like something that can control your life because it will if you let it. It's mind over matter and the feeling you get at the end when you have pushed through is so good, like I'm glad I did that. Sometimes it's glad it's over but it still feels good to have pushed through. You need to get him to apply for jobs himself, get an account with seek and apply for anything that he can.
As a person with anxiety, yes, the only job I wasn’t anxious with was when I was a teenager working at a supermarket with customers. After uni, working in offices with the same old people everyday def made me more anxious. No tea room/lunch expectations, just do your job. I don’t know why, but talking to strangers has never worried be too much, it’s groups of acquaintances.