Im facing a bit of a dilemma..im a single mum with a 5 month old baby. I was seeing a man for a few months when I fell pregnant. When I told him I was pregnant he said he couldnt be there for me and asked me to have an abortion. I couldn't. As much as my daughter wasn't planned she was also very much wanted by me. A few months later I found out he was married with kids. when his wife caught him and rang me and blasted me. She then made him block me and I haven't been in contact since, but I do know where he lives.
I assumed he would have told his wife about the baby but I've just found out from a friend who knows him that he never told her. Now I'm not sure what to do. I feel like I should go to his house and tell her. I plan on telling my daughter the truth when she grows up and feel like it's better this woman knows now than have my daughter show up at 18 (if she wants to) and for the wife to have no idea. The other part thinks I shouldn't meddle in their lives and just leave it be. He never wanted our baby in the first place it was my choice to have her not his. If you were the wife would you want to know?
Secret child
Secret child
Posted in:
Life Lessons, Relationships & Marriage
7 Replies
Yes, tell her!
Tell now. She also deserves to know now not in 10 or 18 years.
Yes tell her now. They can never get this time back. They need to adjust and work through her feelings and emotions. Write a letter to her wit a photo and apologise. Explain to her that you had no idea that he was married. The earlier the better. She will blame you but please tread carefully. Explain that you, thought she has a right to know. I would def want to know, so I could get rid of him. Put a short and heartfelt letter with it. He’s a scum don’t leave it be!
Also make sure it’s her that gets the letter and photo. Or go and speak With her but I think letter would be best and you need to explain the situation to her and apologise.
I mostly certainly would want to know. I’d rather get out now and find out at this age than in another 20 years. She has a right to know then the rest is up to her.
I'd write her. Explain U had no idea she existed. That cheating was never on your part. That you were lied too as much as she was, and because of this, you have a child who will forever suffer for it.
I’m going to be the opposite of everyone else, I wouldn’t tell her. Raise your baby girl your way, tell her the truth when she asks about her father. I believe it will just end up hurting you and your daughter, while they live there fairytale