I had my child’s parent teacher interview this morning and I’m not real happy about it.
After explaining to this teacher that memory issues, poor fine motor skills, lack of concentration and sometimes just generally being a bit out of it are all symptoms of the current diagnosis we are working through with a specialist. All from pressure in the brain from pushing against her skull.
This teacher asks me “are you sure she’s all there in the head” all while my 8 year old is sitting next to us.
She’s not the smartest child when it comes to school work and she’s always need that tiny bit of extra help which has been decreased over the last 2 years because she’s been catching up to “average level” for her grade.
I didn’t say anything at the time because I was pretty shocked. My husband thinks I should put in a formal complaint with the school.
Should I complain or am I just a parent in denial?
Should I complain or am I just in denial?
Should I complain or am I just in denial?
Posted in:
Kids
14 Replies
Oh my gosh, that is terrible. That is definitely something to complain about and I would even go as far as taking my child out until they can put her in a different class.
It doesn’t sound like denial, it sounds like you’re all over her diagnosis and difficulties. If that’s exactly what the teacher said, it’s hella rude and yes you should complain. You can say firstly that it’s so unprofessional but most of all it shows you that she has no idea about your child or how to best deal with her and you want her educated.
Wow, what a totally unacceptable thing for a teacher to say, how awful for you. I think I would have to say something as it’s not on!
100% complain about this, it is not ok to speak about ANYONE like this especially infront of the person.
OMG I would ring the school and lodge it with the education dept if they don’t do anything. That is bloody disgusting! I would be gutted if a teacher spoke to my child like that. How awful! Make sure it’s in an email
in writing and do it asap. Ring the education dept for advice. I’m gobsmacked that a teacher would say such a thing. A teacher recently called my child a name in front of the class. I was horrified and in disbelief!
"Are you sure she's all there in the head?".
Mama, not only is that a wildly offensive, insensitive, ignorant and unprofessional thing to ask or say, it's very much verging into discrimination territory.
I would be making the mother of all complaints. I would take it as high as possible too and I wouldn't be backing down until I was satisfied with the outcome.
I have a bit of background in the disability sector, heads would roll in that industry if anyone in a professional capacity used terms like 'all there in the head'. A teacher knows better than this too - this wasn't just poorly chosen words, it wasn't a lack of education or understanding, it was an insight to the attitude of this particular teacher!
You need to advocate for your daughter now and that teacher needs to be held accountable.
Yes absolutely! It’s not ok for a teacher or anyone
To speak like this about your child. This teacher is in a trusted position to look after your child each and every day that he attends school. I would feel very uneasy about leaving my kids with a teacher that could say such a thing.
She not he sorry
I'd organise a meeting with the principal and ask for the teacher to be present. Tell them exactly how disgusting the comment was, and how it was belittling and harmful for your child. That no respectful teacher would speak that way about any student....I'd personally rip shreds off this teach.
On another note, you will find more compassion and understanding in a smaller school. More one on one time, less students to build bonds with.
Absolutely complain! That is disgusting! The teacher just sounds like an uneducated bully.
No offence but I find this hard to believe, I think the teacher probably suggested therapy and may have suggested other issues like autism or add and you took that to mean “ is she all there in the head”
seems really random that a teacher would be saying that especially when aware of the child’s health issues.
As a parent of multiple children with learning difficulties, one who may never even make it to ‘average’ grades, I have never heard such disgusting language directed at a child by a professional educator in my life!
Now a teacher should be trained to pick up any learning concerns. And that is something a teacher should approach a parent about. Using TACTFUL and positive language - ALWAYS.
In your circumstances you have given a perfectly reasonable explanation & if the teacher wants further information she can request a letter from your health care professional to better accomodate your child. Nothing more.
IF your child doesn’t seem to improve once her condition changes, then the teacher can approach you again to bring concerns to you. Again, in a tactful & positive manner.
There are no excuses for this. This person should no longer be a teacher. Take this as far as you can. It is a disgusting view of anyone with special needs.
I teach around this year level and your post is heartbreaking to read. I would be taking it further with the school. I’d be questioning if this person is even fit to teach if that is their attitude. Sounds like you are doing everything to support your daughter.
I’d report the discussion to the principal and make sure that you express how unhappy and disappointed with the interview you are and a complete disrespect for you and your daughter.
What a fucking disgusting question to ask. I’d be asking her if she’s all there, only an idiot would ask a parent that question.
I’m in the same boat as you with my 10 yr old, yet all the searching for answers in the world, we still can’t work out what’s going on.
You are doing everything right as her parent, keep going mama, and make sure you report how angry you are to the principal. If you get no results from them, go to the department of education and make a complaint. Principals are terrified of the DOE,
I’d let the principal know that you’d like a response and apology for you and your daughter in a particular time frame and if not you’ll be taking it further.
Some people should never become teachers, they do more damage than good.
Sending love, keep going, you and your daughter are stronger than you realise xxx