So my partner went out to a corporate box at the football on Friday night and afterwards him and his mate went to a bar for a drink. They were then refused entry into a club and then his mate went home but my partner didn't tell me that when he got home and kept saying after that 'I crossed the road and went to another bar' and I questioned him about the 'i' and not 'we' and he said 'me and Scotty of course' so I assumed they both went to the next bar, he then told me they both left and got into separate taxis and went home but the following day he got a phone call from his friend and I overheard him say 'I didn't leave long after you', when I questioned him about them not leaving together he obviously didn't remember what he had and hadn't told me the night before and he then told me he also walked down the street and went to another bar/nightclub had a drink and played the pokies also by himself. I just don't understand why he can't tell me the truth from the beginning, we had issues when we first met with him being deceitful about stupid things like this and it just makes me so angry. I am an overly honest person and I just don't understand this at all. Firstly, am I going crazy or do I have a right to be annoyed and secondly does anyone else have an issue with their partner being at a bar/club by themselves even if they are just having a drink and playing the pokies? Mind you, I'm at home with a fractured arm and a 9 month old baby and 2 other children! Thanks ladies x
4 Replies
Ok so no, I wouldn't have an issue with my partner going for a drink/pokies on his own or staying at the bar after his mate went home.
A. I trust him
B. I don't have the right to tell him what he can and can't do, I wouldn't appreciate it of he told me I couldn't go to a bar or something on my own so I wouldn't do it to him.
There's obviously a reason why he doesn't feel he can be completely forthcoming with you though and there's really only two options:
He is either doing something deceitful or he finds it easier to lie to you than to be met with an interrogation every time he goes out.
I would be annoyed he went out if I had a fractured arm and a baby
Your core values don't line up.
You're overly honest, he's been deceitful from the start.
What exactly are you doing? Did you think he would change?
Four words lovely lady: trust your gut always