Last week my husband kicked me out of our family home which we share with our children.
My depression and anxiety had flared up to the point I thought he had a thing for a joint friend - and yes I questioned this due to her behaviour while at our home, following him around and walking into my bedroom while he fold our clothes.
I'm now at a friend's indefinitely and on the waitlist for a psychologist. My trust has been completely broken by him doing this as well as finding and reading my journal.
He still expects me to be at the house every morning after my walk to keep the kids routine and some kind of normality for them. This alone is mentally exhausting for me.
He has apologised for how he dealt with the situation and wished he done things differently, says he loves me and isn't closing the door on us working through this. But he also wished I fight a little harder or differently, I don't even know where to begin with that. He said he wished I chose my family over my depression. And the be clear I do, every day and it's bloody exhausting.
I dont know if I can trust him not to betray my trust like this if we were to resolve and move forward.
7 Replies
So he wants you there in the morning to deal with the hardest part of the day? 😂Oh no sweetheart, go and see them when it's all been done and dusted. He wants to kick you out and have the kids he can deal with the morning routine by himself! He also instead of reassuring you that nothing was going on decided to kick you out? That sends bells ringing. I wouldn't be going back I would be trying to find a house before the kids get too used to you not being there!
Exactly what I thought! noooo, you’re kicked out, let him experience life without you. Do not showup and do the hard parts. That’s not how this works. You either come home and work it out, or separate and work it out.. can’t be both.
You do have a lot to work through. Get yourself a good psych.
He is cheating and your gut is right. He would not have kicked you out for nothing. He is hiding it!!
Notice how he has turned this on you. He is covering what he is up to with that friend! You don’t choose depression or family. He is a clown and a cheating one at that.
If I was you, I would be doing drive bys and ask yourself why he kicked you out so easily. He is keeping you at a distance for a reason. Bet he has her around at night with her car parked around the corner! you are the innocent person in this and there are 2 people who clearly are not innocent. You are their scape goat, so these 2 can mess around without you out of the picture yet come by in the morning once they have had their nights of fun.
Everyone else has covered the issue with your husband. Id like to know what treatments are you recieving for your mental illnesses?
My depression lifted when I left him. If you are being constantly gaslit it's exhausting, everything is exhausting. Please give yourself time to see a life outside of him. Trusting yourself becomes harder when he's telling you it's all in your head and there's this constant confusion and indecision which comes with this. I know that feeling well. Your gut is more than likely spot on but you've become accustomed to doubting yourself. How many times has this man blamed you instead of owning his own behaviour. Please take the time to focus on yourself. You cannot pour from an empty cup and your kids need a happier mum. Not just someone there to complete jobs. I know you may not feel strong enough right now but try to delay or do what you can to make him experience some of what it's like for you. He needs to know how hard it is ox