Together 25 years, 3 kids on their teens. I’m just so heartily sick of not being cared about that I’m wondering if it’s best to be by myself and know for sure that there is noone to care about me than be in a relationship and have him constantly making it obvious that I am of little consequence. 2 weeks ago I left work early due to a migraine. Came home, went to bed, stayed there til meds kicked in a few hours later. Husband (who works from home) came out of his office when I was cooking dinner, and asked what’s news? I said I had to come home as I had a migraine. He grunted, then got a beer and sat at the table to wait for dinner. No asking how I was, no offering to help with dinner …. Nothing. It’s like I had the epiphany that I have no one in my corner who actually cares enough to ask after me. I have a couple of good friends at least. I carry the very vast percentage of the emotional load in this house, from finances, to appointments, to everything with the kids, the majority of the housework, all the shopping and cooking, though I have put my foot down and made him cook dinner every Saturday night to have a break. I work full time as does he, but I earn far less than him. I am inconsequential to him it seems. He also has personal habit, that I’m starting to think is just the straw that will break the camels back. This habit , without going into too many identifying details, is one that can be done quietly and politely whilst saying excuse me, or as loud as possible. I’ve told him how much I dislike it, I’ve asked him to please use manners , and also to not do it at the dinner table, but still a dozen or so times a day he does it, loudly. Despite me saying it repulses me, he says that he should be able to do what he wants in the comfort of his house. Yet my comfort is inconsequential? It literally makes me grit my teeth in disgust every single time I hear him do it. We generally don’t bicker, or fight much, I don’t think we come across as an unhappy couple, I think it’s just me that’s had it. I feel like I am behind a really thick soundproof glass wall jumping up and down banging screaming and he’s just on the other side whistling oblivious. Sorry for the nonsensical rant.
6 Replies
You can be so much happier without him, you don’t have to live this way! He offers you nothing. Bite the bullet, leave his rude disgusting ass and l bet you’ll have wished you left years ago.
I suffer from migraine, it’s the 2nd most debilitating disease world wide. It’s no joke and it’s. Hell/ your husband is a selfish pig! He isn’t considerate of you at all. You need to back right off and put you first. Maybe find yourself a small place or granny flat somewhere and move out. You deserve to live in peace and comfortable and it’ just sounds like you may be better off being friends living apart. He may find some respect for you once you aren’t there.
Move out and see if that makes you happy. Live for you and stop putting other people first. A migraine is no joke, he shouldn’t treat it like it’s nothing. If it was him, you’d make him lay down in a dark room and look after him. Well that’s what any normal caring person would do. Find your happy.
I agree it’s no joke, just posted exactly the same thing. My husband looks after me when I have one.
100%bwtter to be alone than to have a cunt in your ear bringing you down. Is that really the question? It's so much better. You don't have to be alone forever. You can go out, make friends, become happy, really happy. Fill your space only with people that lift you up, it's very important.
I'd rather be alone for the rest of my life knowing I've got my own back than spend one more minute with a person who made me feel so worthless...
His apathy towards you is reprehensible! Imagine having such little regard for someone who's supposed to be your life partner.