I'm at a loss an not knowing what to do. Part of me is saying run an the other is say stay.
A few months back we found out my partner's mum doesn't have long to live, she is deteriorating fast. Since then every weekend An some week nights he has been writing him self off with drinking.
Yes I know we all grieve in different ways, I want to be there for him but after the other night when he hit me out of no where it scared me an got me thinking about when his mum does past what's he going to be like. I have no family to stay with.
Emotions
Emotions
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage
5 Replies
You need to treat the drinking separately from his stress in this situation. He needs to get help and you shouldn't be just putting up with this because his Mum is dying. The police can help you leave.
Yes, you should leave. DV can be escalated during times of stress and family change. Buying a house, having a baby, changing job, death of a family members.
You should take steps to protect yourself. Can you stay with a friend? Try ringing 1800respect for advice.
Leave. Live by yourself. Look at share houses, rentals, or contact a shelter and theyll help you make it happen.
Theres no excuse, no grief, no stress, nothing excuses abusive behaviour. And you need to know that right from the start. You can support him with boundaries. But while dealing with an abusive partner youre in no position to be supporting anyone, let alone him. You are your first priority. Youre definitely not his. Be careful how much you give trying to help him.
Go. Even if it’s just until he sorts himself out. Show him that behavior is totally unacceptable! If you stay you’re letting him think it’s ok.
You need to give him an ultimatum. Stop drinking and get dv counselling or Leeeeaaave. I would personally leave but if you want to be with him this is the only option. Never ok to hit someone.