Feeling pretty upset. 1 of my close friends of a good 6 years have all of a sudden ghosted me -sort of. I don't understand why. We used to message each other all the time like it would be weird for a day or 2 to go without hearing from her then a few weeks ago, nothing for about 3 days. I messaged to check in and she was like oh just not feeling myself, left it it at that. I was like here if you need anything since then nothing. I don't know if I have done something or if there is more going on with her she doesn't want to share. I know she has been on fb and stuff because it pops up she is commenting on things which is what makes me think more that I have done something wrong. Would you message again to check in or just accept that the friendship has suddenly turned more distant? This has been about a month since we last contacted. I feel hurt because I always considered her a close friend.
9 Replies
Depressed? Anxious? Stressed? Busy? Sick? Sooo many options
How close are you located? How often do you meet face to face?
I had a friend like this. Saw or spoke to each other every day. Then one day she just became more distant and i rarely heard from her. Its been 6 months now and ive heard nothing. I came to find out she ghosted a whole bunch of people once she decided she hated something small about them . Totally superficial things too. I let it go. If she were really that good a friend she wouldnt turn away unannounced. But in ypur case it's only early days. Give it time . If it turns into a lot longer , then I'd say you were ghosted. Just write it off if it takes ages, and because you were really good friends theres no long term excuse for this. But right now its not long enough to call it quits yet on her.
Sometimes it’s hard to have the difficult conversation, I’ve been on the other side and it’s very awkward.
Basically, I just didn’t like this persons personality, they just weren’t my cup of tea.
It doesn’t make me a villain, we are all free to choose our friends.
We have free agency to let who we want in our lives.
My best friend of 10+ years did this to me. About 4 months after she just stopped talking to me I found out that she had been sleeping with my partner for two years and was pregnant with his baby.
I had this happen. We had been extremely close for about 5 years - saw each other for coffee every week, spoke and chatted multiple times during the week as well. Our daughters were competitive in the same sport but different age groups, and my daughter qualified for state championships, and hers did not. Overnight, she stopped talking to me. I was shocked. I kept contacting her, and we met up a little, but it was very different and I felt like I was walking on eggshells. I emailed her, she did call me, but it's never been the same. That was years ago now. I see her occasionally, we say "oh we'll catch up" but she never returns my messages. It's not just me it's happened to, either. I'm incredibly sad that those years have gone, but also know that sometimes friends are in your life for a short time, sometimes a long time, sometimes forever. And sometimes you need to let people go.
I am this friend. I disconnected from a very close friend. Not to be spiteful or hurtful but because there's only so much negativity I can deal with. Her mental health issues were affecting my own mental health and I had to start distancing myself. There's always a reason why people distance themselves from others. Maybe they just didn't want to hurt your feelings
Yep, been there.
Yep going through this currently! She use to talk to me everyday whether that be commenting on nearly every fb post or texting me etc then all of a sudden, nothing! She lied to me and said oh I’m not on fb that much (to see the updates I post on my kids as she asked about them, beforehand she knew everything) then I just see her on fb all the time. I hate liars, if you don’t want to talk to me, just say so