I have a partner who has 5 children the 5th one he had with me 4 years ago the other four are all in there teens that he had with his ex wife, he’s not really into children and I am blessed to have one but the older my four year old is getting the more I feel I would like one more just one more as for me I only have one child and would love a sibling for my son closer to his age, how do I approach this with my partner ?
11 Replies
Not really into children but has 5? Is that your way of saying he ignores the ones he has? If that's a yes then I don't think you should have more. Actually, however you mean that, should be reason to not have more.
I agree, except that youre parenting so if you can handle 2 on your own if you needed/wanted to be in that situation, do it.
The best way to approach him is to just ask him. I had ‘one more’ with my now ex that he agreed to because I wanted one more (didn’t find out he wasnt that keen for another one till after the fact). While together he was alright, kinda hands on but not amazing. Now separated he sees his kids 1 day (yes 1 day) a fortnight. Mostly just to show them off to whoever his new gf is for the month.
I guess my question is if your partner isn’t ‘really into kids’ and he did agree to one more to please you, and you separated later down the track are you okay with raising the 2 children you would have to him alone?
Nope from me.
I would not be happy having a child with someone who is disinterested in kids.
Think about the kids welfare and the kids that are already here welfare. That disinterested dad, breaks his kids hearts over and over again. Then you add another kid to the mix stretching his time with the children that already exist further, meaning more heartbreak.
It’s one thing deliberately having a baby with someone you think is a good dad, it’s another to deliberately have one with a shit one.
So he’s a shit dad and you’re using him as a baby maker. Urghhh....no, I don’t think you should have more kids with this man. This is very dysfunctional.
He’s not a shit dad, a very hands on dad takes all his children to all there individual sporting events which takes up a lot of time I just feel bad adding another child to the 5 he already has, yes I have one with him but he has 5, at some point I am sure he will want to be kid free for a bit
How does a child grow up with a father who "isn't really into children"??
Wtf, I wouldn't be bringing another child into that
He is a hands on father, spends a lot of time with his children, we have them week on week off But I just feel bad wanting another, he is an amazing man, always wants to be with his family over his friends but just don’t know about another child, as he already has 5 that’s a lot of kids !
I'm curious why the need to say he's not into children if you claim he's so fantastic?
Because he’s just not someone who is into them he will do anything for his kids but just not as into it as other dads are, he’s the fun dad and the loving husband but I think he cringes at the thought of having to go to kid things like birthday parties etc, screaming, tantrums, I think it’s more the patience thing, he is the most amazing man, cooks the dinners makes the coffees on the morning does the housework, I feel bad getting all these people bagging my man because he’s not into kids but hey I bet you he is better than 95% of theres
Why don’t you just ask him?🤔