Is lockdown making you realise that your marriage is over. Im married to a workaholic and he's a great person. I've begged for years for him to spend time with us. Not big asks, just spend the day with us on the beach, going for a walk, or playground, going for a bike ride etc. I have 4 kids so some activities I find hard to do on my own, but I really feel like the kids need physical activity after so much screentime etc. But before lockdown I had decided I would live my life with my own excitement. I was always on my own with the kids on weekends and holidays. So I decided I would do what I wanted with them on my own. I was feeling great I could do this. We would go on weekends away, holidays etc. I was sick of waiting for my husband and he would be the one missing out anyway! But since lockdown, he has worked more, I am more lonely than ever but I can't go through with my plan of "doing it on my own" we have literally been stuck at home since March and I have never been so lonely and full of resentment.
2 Replies
Does he work a lot by choice or because he has to? If it's by choice, then he needs to find a healthy balance with you regarding them and stop ignoring them. They are his kids too. Not just yours. I noticed how you wrote 'i have 4 kids' . You BOTH have 4 kids not just you. My husband is like this too, but is getting better. Slowly but getting there.
If it's not by choice, then not a lot you can do other than being supporting of the position he is in , and how he is providing for you all. He's probably incredibly exhausted. Even still , fresh air outside with you all could do him the world of good. Unless he's already an outside worker.
I completely understand how u feel. Lockdown has made me look at everything too. I asked him not to do as much overtime but he still will but that before my mental health of being home alone all the time with the kids. I liked someone else’s idea of camping in the back yard with me and the kids but he will just look at that as his time coz he works so hard haha. You are not alone with this if that helps at all