I don’t know what’s Wrong with me, when I have money I just want to spend it and it’s caused a lot of problems. And my husband has worked out that I have spent $25000 of our savings, but the thing is I don’t even know what I have spent it on I have nothing to show for it. I need help
Spending money on stuff
Spending money on stuff
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Mental Health, Anxiety & Depression, Money
3 Replies
There's nothing wrong with you. It depends on where you've come from and what you've learned about money management.
If you want to be more aware and careful with your money, start by taking note of where it's going.
Are you buying food with it? Paying bills or things for the kids? Go through bank transactions to see where the problem is.
my husband is a bit like that, has impulsive issues and spends on stuff - it can be anything, 5th pair of sneakers for one of the kids, paying for lunch when with work friends, eating out what ever. if i like anything i can't say so or he will buy it, cars, bikes and the danger is he earns great money and has very little savings.
I am sure this behaviour was caused from living through the family going bankrupt when he was a teen, so feels like he missed out on things, so has the i worked hard i deserve it mentality.
We have very separate finances, he pays the mortgages and his car. along with running costs of his stuff, i keep the house , all bills kids stuff etc, it works out close to the same. needles to say i also have a great savings account, and he has no idea. if he had access it would be spent on 10 mins on shit. I figure whilst it's not 100% honest if something goes wrong i can keep the entire family afloat for a while, and if i never need it then it can support our retirement. i used to be very angry about this however have realised that i can't control him but can make sure the kids and i are okay.
I feel like if you know you can't be trusted you need an allowance and everything else is managed. also be aware that it's more likely psychological, and you need to unpack why you behave this way