Hi mums,
I've sadly come to realise, when looking through Facebook on other mums' profiles, that they appear in photos with their family/children a lot. Whereas I rarely ever do. The reason is because I hate having my photo taken. I will always try to be the designated photographer once the phones comes out. I know that in 20, 30, 40+ years from now I'm going to deeply regret not being in photos with my children and family. But how do I overcome the sheer hate and discomfort of seeing yourself in photos? I'm only slightly overweight (and working on losing the last 4kgs to be a 'healthy' weight), but it's those physical attributes I can't change so easily that I hate the most. My teeth, my nose, the bags under my eyes etc. etc. etc. As soon as a look at a photo of myself, I see all those flaws glaring back at me and it makes me cringe and feel sorry for everyone around me who has to look at me.
Any advice? Is this even normal? My mother was the same growing up, so I assumed it's normal. I feel okay in my self-confidence usually, but once I see a photo of myself it's like my ego got kicked in the stomach.
6 Replies
We’re so critical of ourselves aren’t we? But I understand and would be interested in any advice others give in this situation.
I get it. I've been the same and still do pick apart a photo of myself but I am always taking photos of myself and the kids for the sheer fact, I'll want them later on despite what i look like. I don't post all photos to social media because I'm not comfortable with them all. And every one else is exsctly the same... we only post photos that we are comfortable with. We never see the photos of people where they think they look shit... So of course everyone else's Facebook photos look amazing and happy and pretty and perfect.
I dont like certain parts about myself that are non-changeable too but I have got to know the certain angles to face to make myself to hide my flaws. And my go-to pose with the kids is snuggling into their neck (so my face isn't actually really in the photo lol) or kissing them on the cheek. Or looking at the kids and smiling while they look at the camera and smile. Maybe if your practiced taking more selfies to get a feel for the types of smiles/expressions you are comfortable with would help. But other wise, I think a big part of it is just accepting that most of us look like shit in 90% of our photos but we just don't post those ones lol
Distance and pose. Don't do close ups, don't sit face on smiling at the camera. Get more natural shots, those are the ones I like of myself in pics. And sometimes even if you look rubbish, if it's a good moment the important thing is that you've caught it and can remember you were there.
I have some friends who I have no photos at all of, there seem to be none. And now theyre gone. Its a really really sad thing.
I am the same! I hate photos of myself and have hardly any. Funny thing is though is that when I look at photos of myself from 5 or 10 years ago I think, wow I used to be OK looking, which is not what I thought at the time. I think it's like how anorexic people only see what fat they have, not how skinny they are - I only see what's wrong with me not what's right with me.
Absolutely!! Another tip - take it and do not delete it. Keep it. Put it away even if you don't like it, just put it away and see how you feel when you look at it in a few years.
It’s completely normal I hate photos of myself HATE THEM
But I get in some for my kids . My
Kids see my face everyday they know what I look like and they love me . When they get older they are going to want memories of me being there with them and they won’t remember a different version of me they’ll remember me as I am. I don’t take photos of me for me . I take them to preserve my kids memories . It makes it easier ;)