Divorce/financial separation

I'm feeling like I have just been kicked in the face. I went to see a lawyer yesterday after being separated for 9 months. Was together over 12 years, married 9 years.
He had bought a unit prior to me with an inheritance, his parents actually bought the rest as he didn't work. When we married we took out a joint home loan to pay his parents back plus extra to renovate the place.
Anyway since then we have owned and sold 2 places and currently own. I pay for the home loan, rates, bills, everything for the kids. He has never had them overnight, lives with his parents and pays for nothing and is not currently working.
He constantly harasses me through calls and text and takes no responsibility for the kids. He wants to get back together but there is no way I'm going back to that emotional abuse. It was toxic and I was a wreck from doing everything and being treated badly.
So back to yesterday, they tell me I may not even get 50% of the settlement and he basically gets to dictate where I live and what I do or I will be spending $$$ in court. I just feel so deflated. I have been through so much and I can not take it anymore. I just want to be able to look after my kids and have a roof over their head. I'm not greedy but I just feel like he will get all the money and still have all the power over me. I feel like I will never get out of this nightmare.
I also earn more because I worked bloody hard to get where I am and carried him through job losses and a lot of bullshit yet that all goes against me.
Does anyone have advice?