Hi wonderful IM community. I am wanting some advice on if I should take any action. Back story, my daughters BFF is living in a DV household where this has been occurring for the past 3 yrs that I have known her, but recently things have escalated. Before xmas her parents had a physical altercation where the police were called and now there is an AVO & pending hearing for her father. Her mother had an AVO filed against him but both parties honestly are as bad as one another, I have seen pictures of physical damage done to both parties. My concern is that the children involved , daughter and her younger brother, do not want to live with their mother. I have seen txts where she has asked her grandma to collect her as she is afraid of her mum. Her mum has taken away her phone/communication and has also physically assaulted her (dragging her down hallway by her hair, physically holding her down). Mum has a history of being violent and throwing objects, such as knives at her spouse and kids. Unfortunately mum is always at "work", never home, leaves the children unattended and with no food or money. Ususally the kids call their grandparents to get them..The children also have spent the majority of time in care with their Grandparents the grandparents do all the traditional role of parents per se, school parent teacher interviews/pickup/taking them to see friends etc.. There is nothing official in place at the moment with custody and I am not sure what will eventuate with the AVO hearing. Currently the grandma is trying to keep the kids with her but there is no legal basis for her to do so. I am wondering if I should report what I know, or do I just leave it and trust that the police will sort it out. I am urging their Grandma to get advice on formal guardianship but I don't know how that works and what their dad will do, he so far has not taken any action to resolve arrangements. I feel concerned for the kids as they are not in any formal arrangement, they do not feel safe in their own home, currently their father cannot go to the family home either
7 Replies
there is much more to the story but I guess my question is should I report anything? Id feel terrible if the kids were hurt, they are 11 and 9.
Reporting just adds to the big picture of anything else they might know and they look at it all together to triage whether action is required. Given what you have said, I think it's worth flagging.
that is my main aim as such, to build a picture so it comes from a few sources. Im in SA, im not sure who to report to, the CARL line?
https://www.sa.gov.au/topics/education-and-learning/health-wellbeing-and...
Yes, I absolutely think it's worth making a report about anything you are aware of because it does help build a case. Just keep in mind that they can't do a lot with second hand information. So make sure you're reporting things you have either witnessed or the kids have specifically told you, anything else is kind of considered to be rumours and heresay.
Good on you for caring though, so many people would just turn a blind eye because it's easier.
Please report! If you feel uncomfortable go to a local police station and disclose what you know, your local school, the hospital and speak to someone. All of these people are mandatory reporters.
The best thing to do it write down everything you know. Then call Child Services. But at the very least disclose this information to a mandatory reporters, plllllllease!
Oh please report! I wish someone had of with me. I can tell.you first hand it's not a nice way to live, always on edge, anxious, scared, hungry. After all these years it still affects me. The physical scars fade, the mental ones never do. Please, please report this!